Insanity Enjoyed

2010-11-08T09:44:00.000-08:00

You know that friend you've been meaning to call or email and haven't. Time goes by and its been so long that you are embarassed now. Maybe they are a little irked with you for being out of contact for so long. Then its been so extrememly long that you feel like you should have something really important or exciting to tell them when you contact them? Finally something comes up, you have the perfect reason, and then you get really busy again and the cycle starts all over? Yep, thats how Im feeling about my blog lately...ok more than lately, more like the past 6 months!! Craaaaazy. But Im back. Sort of. Somewhat.

Did you notice the little nablopomo icon thingamajigger I put on my page (the typewriter?) For some reason I always think that Im going to post every day in November. Doesn't that make sense? Because absolutely nothing is going on in November and its not the start of all the holiday craziness or anything. But thats me, living in my land of illusions and dreams. The land where my house is not only totally clean but decorated all homey and awesome. The land where Im not behind on a million projects and starting ten more. The land where my body keeps up with my imagination. Yeah, that land. Some people seem to actually really live in that land. Its real for them, not imaginary. And I hate them. A lot. So I read their blogs all the time just to show them how much I cant stand them.

The ice is broken. Ive actually got a new post, so now I can feel comfortable to come and just right whatever once again. I thought about taking down my little blog posting month thing but really, thats just too much work right now. And its a small little motivator. Obviously Im not going to post every day (um helllo its already the 8th.) But I dont want to be totally pathetic and only post once all month so up it stays. I hope someone still checks here occassionally because I love comments (well nice ones anyways) and I like to pretend that Im wildly popular and loved by millions. Well not really but that just kind of blurted out. I have 6 months worth of junk in my head that wants to just blurt out. I guess kind of like a blogging Tourettes.

And now, a picture. It has absolutely nothing to do with my blog, this post, or anything that I even normally like. But Ive had it saved on my computer (for some future random post) forever and my BT (blogging tourettes) is making me post it. I am not a fan of dressing up animals. Unnecessary and they always look so sad or totally pissed off. But this picture makes me smile. Maybe its because despite it all their is a certain regalness in the poor pooch's demeanor. And I think its a good place to end for today.

AVAtar

2010-05-28T00:20:00.000-07:00

We just finished watching the movie Avatar for the second time the other night. Both times Ava flitted in and out of the room doing her own thing and staying occasionally to watch for a few minutes. She is still really into animals and if they are in a movie in some way she is much more interested/worried about them. So in the scene (small spoiler alert if you havent seen it yet) where the animals come to help fight the battle she was very excited and of course worried too that they might get hurt. But mainly she was happy the animals were going to help the Leotards. What? You're confused? You know the blue people on the planet and the humans who are using the cloned bodies to help out..the Leotards.

No matter how many times we correct her she still says leotards instead of Avatars. And then Ben added to it by calling them Ava-tars since her name was in the title. Despite all the name calling the movie was enjoyed and Bens first words when it was over were "I want to watch Avatar 2!"

One Mantle Down

2010-03-20T14:13:00.000-07:00

I've always wanted a mantle to decorate but never lived in a house with a fireplace. Now we live in a house with a 3-sided fireplace! Not as awesome as you might think. That third small side mantle between the 2 rooms is kind of pain. Especially if the 2 rooms have different looks going on. Im kind of getting off topic though because this post is not about the 3rd side of the mantle. Its just about one main side.

A side that looks awe-some now I might add. Really, Im very pleased with how it turned out. Our front room (versus the family/tv room) is kind of sad and empty right now with a mishmash of furniture. But someday it will look pretty. And it just got one big step in the right direction with the mantle. At least I think so :) Ive wanted a beachy room (I know, I live in the desert, not at the beach, but whatever) and since the front room is designless at this point; it now has something it can dream of becoming.

The driftwood I got from the beach last time we went to the Oregon coast. My hubby looked at me like I was crazy when I came up the hill with a huge armload of driftwood. I just smiled at him and said I had "plans" for it. The picture I picked up at an estate sale and I love it. I repainted the frame and I like how the mantle gives it its own little place of honor.

I like the little mason jars with sand and those plain old metal and white votive lights that you can buy in a huge bag for a few bucks. A few books from my vast supply of old books that my hubby thinks I have way to many of. Of course I know that one can never have too many so I just roll my eyes when he says that.

Please ignore the fingerprints and smudges on the hurricane vases. I think I see a little windex in their future. I got all 3 of the vases at the goodwill at different times and theyre filled with pottery barn shells (that I bought at the goodwill) as well as some small driftwood sticks and some random vase filler ball stuff that I had laying around (wasnt that an awesome description lol.)

Here it is one last time. And if you're wondering why you only see the mantle and not the whole fireplace the answer is quite simple. It was a total disaster right in front of it. Since the room is kind of empty I have several of my "projects" stacked there in various levels of completedness (I dont think thats a real word but you get my meaning...I hope.)

I'm linking up to Frugal Friday over at The Shabby Nest. Go check out the other great links.

Pretty new look

2010-03-16T19:05:00.000-07:00

So what do you think? Do you like the new look of the blog? I'm very proud that I did it myself (with a little advice from you Heather.) I kept with the whole retro picture thing because...I like it :) Although Im not sure about the pinups. I like them but do you think they're too much? I just had to use them because they are just so me. I'm always up on the roof in my nylons and full makeup you know. Once again I'm sure Im infringing on some copyright with the pics but I dont have tons of traffic so I think I'll be ok. I used the Background Fairy (which I found via the Graphics Fairy) for my wallpaper and used picnik to make a collage of the pics and write my blog's name across it. See there are benefits to having sleep problems and being on the computer at 2 am.

My new dress

2010-02-21T17:50:00.000-08:00

I went to a new store down at the District. Its called DownEast basics. The rack full of shirts with a big sign saying $5 lured me in. The kids were less than pleased since we were suppose to be there to look at dogs at the pet adoption event. Well I got my $5 shirt and then came up with a great plan. I grabbed another shirt so that I could embellish my plain shirt... something like this:

And then with the remaining shirt I can make a skirt for Ava. Nifty, aint it.

But even better than the shirts I found my dress fot Easter... and I wasnt even looking. It reminds me of something that you'd see at Anthropologie but for way less. And the best part is that it has... pockets! I'm over the moon for dresses with pockets. I absolutely adore them.

Apparently lots of other people in blogland already know about this store but Im just now discovering it. I will definitely be going back..without the kids this time. Or at least without Ben. Ava likes to shop and was taking shirts off the rack she thought I would like and bringing them over. Until she discovered that they had some dresses her size. She seems to think that everything is suppose to be fair and that if I buy me something to wear that Im suppose to buy her something as well. I am going to be in big trouble as she gets older if this is how she is at 5.

Better parenting via Wii

2010-02-19T13:51:00.000-08:00

Alls I have to say right now is thank goodness for the Wii. We should have gotten one ages ago. We have been without any gaming system for a couple of years now..much to my son's dismay. But we are back in business people.

Video games. I don't see what all the hubbub is about, why some parents are all anti-video games. Its one of the best discipline tools out there. Maybe their children are perfect and they dont need something to ground their children from? When we had our PS2 I think that Ben was grounded from it more than he actually played it. And then it broke, and we were all sad, for different reasons.

We've been wanting to get a Wii since...oh when they came out. For Valentine's Day we decided to get a Wii as a family gift and forego any personal gifts. I know, nothing says I love you like a new video game, right? Before you get all on my Hubby's case for being rather unromantic (which is true,) it was actually my idea. Two days after Valentine's Day is Hubby's bday and I bought him the Wii Fit which is what Ive really been wanting. I had a master plan you see. And please don't think Im mean for getting Hubby something I wanted for his birthday. Wait, what am I saying. If you are a woman, you probably totally understand. Anyhoo, back to all the Wii business.

So now I have all sort of extra benefits besides just the entertainment value of the wii. I now have something to threaten Ben with grounding from. Right now, just the mere threat of it is enough to get him back in line. Awesome. And both kids love the wii fit so they are playing but exercising at the same time. Yes, yes, I know. Thats what outside is suppose to be for. But on days like today, where Im flat on my back on the couch because of the fibro, it makes me feel a little less like a crappy mom. Because of how Im feeling, my kids are cooped up. Now I can at least make sure they are getting some exercise and being active even if I cant. On really bad days, like today, sitting up for any period of time is an effort, so watching them out front ride their bikes isnt really an option. Now, I can watch them run in place (hysterical) or try their hand at step aerobics (which only results in Ben yelling at the tv I've discovered.) And if any of you have a hard time with the wii tennis? Contact my 5 year old. She has the technique down pat and is very hard to beat. She just swings the remote back and forth like a mad woman and seems to hit almost everything.

I have actually not gotten to use the wii fit myself yet. Ive got my profile all set up but thats as far as its gone. The house, feeling rebellious and wanting to be messy, has eaten my Gopher. It has literally vanished in to thin air. Which means more bending, stooping, bending, stooping, squatting, bending to pick up all the crap my kids scatter across the house. Which then leads to todays condition. Actually, I shouldn't blame the kids since I was working on our room yesterday. Its always the last to get any attention and was in sad shape. I just dont understand where my kids get their messy habits from. Hmmm. The sad truth, is the main reason I started on our room was because I thought I might find that dang gopher. Whatever the reason, its nice to be able to actually walk in our walk-in closet. Sadly, still no sign of the missing best-tool-ever.

I've totally digressed from the topic at hand and could go on forever about my house cleaning woes...but I'll spare you. I think I should stop writing now, as I feel that I could ramble on forever. Its almost like having adult conversation. Ok, ok, ok (channeling a little Joe Pesci) I will leave you with an entertaining link to a site I was having lots of fun reading earlier today.

http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

Oh, I've been twittering more so if you really want to stalk me you can catch me there too.

http://twitter.com/insanityenjoyed

For the kids

2010-02-13T11:56:00.000-08:00

Here's an idea for a new addition to the blog. A post for the kids occasionally. They will usually most likely involve animals or small children.

Do you like how I have all these ideas for additions but they rarely make more than one or two appearances?

Here's the latest video that makes the kids say "again, again!" Their desire for a new cat might be partly to blame for their being so enamored with this.

Surprised kitty

My Tumblr

2010-02-13T10:59:00.000-08:00

I've seen others using tumblr as a way to remember sites or ideas that they have come across. I thought it was a great idea and finally went and made one myself. My computer thanks me now that I dont have to bookmark every third page I come across. And its one more way to share too much about myself (my son is reading over my shoulder and just informed me that I can't start a sentence with and. Im such a rule breaker lol.)

So if you are interested in or nosey about what interests me then go take a peek over here.

Ballerina Birthday Party

2010-02-11T10:26:00.000-08:00

I love to throw parties. Starting at the kids' first birthday I planned big parties. Yes, I know, that at one they are not going to remember their party. I freely admit that the big parties are as much for me (if not more) than for them. I love the whole planning thing. Themes are great! Ben's first bday was ducky themes and we had little rubber duckies everywhere..even in the little kiddie pool outside. And I admit to getting a little too emotionally invested in the whole thing. How else can I explain the torrent of tears when the cake I ordered from the grocery store did not look anything like I had asked.

In what world does a cake that is suppose to be blue with mounds of bubbles..like a bathtub, come out blue with a white pipe border? Especially when I spent 15 minutes discussing it with the lady and she assured me it would be no problem? See, a little too invested. Its almost 7 years later and Im still irked about it. It was easily fixed when I put the rubber duckies and candles on it. But it was no where as cute as it should have been. OK, off the cake tangent.

I feel a little guilt as far as Ava's parties go because I never quite spend as much time planning them as its not that long after Christmas. I always intend to start planning earlier but it never quite happens. This year at least we picked the theme early so I was able to at least start thinking of ideas (ie reading everyone else's ideas that I googled.) She changed her mind a million times and then settled on a ballaringa party. As much as she loves ballet and ballerinas she can not say it right. It always comes out ballaringa. Which I love.

As previously posted these were the whole reason I really wanted her to choose a ballet party.

I had originally planned on making a cupcake tower like this

via Design Dazzle

But I ran out of time. Which was ok because I had 2 cute cake plates that I really liked and by that time I was so frazzled I was way more apt to let things just be.

I made no sew tutus for all the girls. For directions you can go here. But of course, like so many of my parties, I dont have pictures of them. Some of the girls wore them but some already came in ballet outfits so they just took them with them when they left. I have a few pics of some of the girls but since they arent my children Im not going to post them.

I made really cute tissue paper flower pom poms. I think, besides the cupcake toppers, these were my favorite. They are so easy to make and they look great. Im going to put them in Ava's room when I take them down.

Yes they are still up. I left them up for Valentine's decorations. I hung them from the ceiling with fishing line.

Don't you think that 100 balloons sounds like a lot. Me too. But when all blown up they arent as many as I thought. Of course by time this picture was taken a good number of them were already on the ground. What I didnt know, and the party store didnt tell me, is that helium balloons are only good for about 8 hours unless you add this other ingredient..which they sell but didnt offer or even tell me about. Grrrrr. That one will probably irk me for several years. It was all good though because the kids loved kicking and hitting them around.

We didn't have games because Ava never wants games at her parties. Her reasoning is that she might not win and then she would be sad at her birthday. Its a little greedy of her so one of these days Im going to have to talk with her a little more about that one.

Of course I love planning parties but the real enjoyment I get out of it is this:

Dazzled by Design Dazzle

2010-02-04T21:18:00.000-08:00

One of my newer favorite blogs to check daily is Design Dazzle. She finds some of the greatest ideas to share and we must have similar taste because I love almost everything that she posts. I think one of the best things is the variety. Its very kid related but there's awesome room design ideas, party themes and decorating (you know how I love those parties.) Plus theres lots of pictures which with my short attention span is what I need lol. Right now she's having a Lisa Leonard giveaway so Im totally sucking up and getting more entries for the drawing by posting about DD. Which I dont mind because I love the blog. Ive entered other contests where I could get extra entries if I blogged but I didnt love the actual blog so I refrained. So go check her out and you might see some of "my" good ideas (ie things that Ive stolen from there and made.)

via Design Dazzle

And mine..photography's not as good but I love them!

Time for a new look and a little introspection

2010-01-31T12:43:00.000-08:00

I think its time for a new look. What you say? Haven't you already gotten a pretty radical new look by getting your nose pierced and bleaching your hair blonde? Why yes, yes I have.

But I was talking about the blog's look, not my own.

You might have noticed if you stop in occassionally that the page color seems to change as often as my hair color. I just can't seem to get it right. And the most recent gray was just downright depressing...kind of like the gray in my hair. Ive loved the header that I made (with much mutterings and errors) but its been there, like forever, and we know how I like change. Must be the Sagittarius in me or something. So I'm going to hopefully be changing the look a little in the next few days (take note: this really means in the next month or so.)

Now I'm off to find some tutorials on how to make cool headers because I know there are way easier ways to do it than the crazy-try everything-till-it works way that I did it the first time. And maybe this time I can find something that is probably not copyrighted.

Here's a new addition to my blog that I might or might not keep.

Link for the day. A new blog that I think you should go check out. 'Cause Im all that and you should really listen to me. Ha! (that deserved an actual Ha versus a lol I thought.) It might be a blog that I just discovered but you probably have already been reading forever. Or a blog that I just adore. Or maybe just a post from a blog. Its only going to be one link per post. I love the blogs that give you tons of cool sites to go look at, but lets get serious now, thats just not going to happen.

Todays link is:

Color Me Katie
I love love love and love her blog. It makes me smile. A big ole cheesy grin smile. And I walk away from her blog feeling kind of warm and fuzzy and wanting to sing a little ditty while twirling around like my 5 year old. (Sidenote: My kids love her blog and like me to replay the little clips...alot.)

But at the same time I sometimes feel like crying. Because, and this is hard to find the correct wording to describe it, I want to feel on the inside like she lives on the outside. And I think once-upon-a-time I did and Ive lost it somewhere. So I guess, for me, reading her blog is a bittersweet experience at times. Sweet because she makes you smile and giggle and that tinge of bitterness that the part of me that responds to that has become a little dampened and lost at times.

Ok, that was a little deeper than just a link to a blog I like. But the house is empty, its just me, and I have the time to be a little introspective. I was feeling a little blah from doing too much yesterday so my mom took the kids to church and I stayed home and watched the service over the internet. Which was nice being able to sit around in my pink comfy robe, drink coffee out of my favorite mug, and listen to God's word in my quiet, peaceful-for-the moment, home.

I wish for all of you a moment like that today. At least a few moments of quietness, peacefulness, and contentment in our usually busy loud everyday lives.

The Gopher-The Best Tool Ever!

2010-01-04T21:49:00.000-08:00

No, I am not exagerrating. The Gopher is totally amaaaaaaazing! What the heck am I talking about?

This:

I would admit I am a total dork except that the person who told me that I absolutely must go and get one was my totally cool and hip hairdresser Reuben. Which in and itself cracks me up. As he was cutting my hair he went into a 15 minute lecture on how awesome it was and that I must must must must go get one. And if I didnt like it, he said, he would even buy it back from me. I was hooked. Im sure the fact that I love informercials didnt hurt.

And now...kids' legos on the floor. Pow it picks them up. Shoe? Pick it up and throw it into the right room without even having to bend over. Which was the big seller for me. All the bending over is what kills my back when cleaning and really shortens the time Im able to do stuff. Yes, my kids should pick up their own crap. But when it doesnt happen (always) its gotta be done. I walk around with a bag or basket and the 2 front rooms are cleaned easy peasy. I can stand in one spot in Bens room and pick up his dirty laundry off the floor and put them in the hamper, put his legos where they should be, books back on shelves...and I didnt even have to move or bend over. Yes sirree bob, I am in lurve!

One extra bonus. I dont want the kids to break it so I tell them not to touch it. Which of course has made them just dying to try it out. So if they are good I give them the prize of....getting to clean with The Gopher.

Something better than a resolution

2010-01-01T23:24:00.000-08:00

Im usually a "make resolutions" type person for the New Year. I might have failed the previous year to stick to them but that doesnt stop me from making new ones each year (or some of the same old ones lol.) This year instead of resolutions Im picking one word to focus on for the year.

This is not my brilliant idea. I was partying it up last night for New Years Eve (laying in bed watching tv and reading blogs) when I came across Clover Lane. I loved her idea of picking just one word to be the emphasis of your new year.

A word can encompass so many different areas. For me a word is easier to remember than a whole bunch of resolutions and I like the idea of displaying it somewhere to remind me of what I want for the New Year. After much thought my word is Choose. I choose to spend my time wisely (less daytime computer, more quality kids time), choose to be healthier, choose to be joyful, choose to pray more and be more consistent with my devotions, choose to be frugal...you get the picture. Oh and one I really like is to choose to be present in the moment that is happening right now.

Black and Orange...Go Beavs!!

2009-12-03T09:13:00.000-08:00

Ok so November was a bust. Forgot that I was going on vacation for 2 weeks when I signed up for nablopomo. So I felt no guilt (only slightly) and didnt post. But I am back. Im going to post, sporadically of course, but that is me. Im learning to accept certain things about myself and just work with it. But enough about me, on to the topic of the day.

The Civil War!

No, not the American Civil War, but the college rivalry Civil War. Namely the annual football game between Oregon State University Beavers (WooHoo) and the University of Oregon Ducks (Boo!) The Civil War inspires some intense and even rabid feeling in its fans. And well it should. It has had enough build up and history. The first civil war football game was in 1894.

I will admit that Im not a huge sports follower. If the occassional game is on I enjoy watching and of course root for the Beavs but thats about it. Unless its Civil War time. Then its all about the Black and Orange. I dont know why. Its like the fever pitch from Corvallis has made its way all the way down here and can almost be felt palatably. The kids have been taught the fight song. Any thoughts of rooting for the Ducks had been dealt with properly (You wanna root for the Ducks like Uncle Rich? Then go live with Uncle Rich!)

Living in Nevada there has been the claim that we should root for both teams at various points in the season since they are both from our home state. Ummm....no! I just cant do it. In my time at OSU I must have gotten the full dose of Duck hating indoctrination because I just cannot bring myself to even remotely root for them even if the Beavers are totally out as far as a bowl game goes. Or maybe the year I got stranded in Eugene after a Civil War game and wandered around in the cold rain for hours lost might have something to do about it...but thats another story.

This years Civil War game is even more important. Its the War of the Roses or I mean the War for the Roses. Whoever wins the Civil War game goes on to play in the Rose Bowl. Can there be any better reason to cheer for out team loudly and brainwash our children to hate the colors green and yellow? I dont think so.

I'm off to search for a sports bar that I can take the kids to. I guess I should call it a Sports Restaurant..that makes me sound like a better parent doesnt it?

OOOOOOOO........SSSSSSSSSS.......UUUUUUUUUU

OREGON STATE

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

My new bed

2009-11-09T20:57:00.000-08:00

I wrote a couple of days ago about my bed that I was redoing. But then I lied and didnt post the after pictures the next day like I said. Truth be told I had to clean my room first. Which doesnt quite make sense since you cant see very much of my room in the pictures. But I know that its clean.

Brief recap:

Had bed. Sick of it. Started to stain it. Way harder than I thought. Put it

away for 3 months. Did 2nd coat which was super easy. Love new bed.

Wow, maybe I should write like that more often. I can tell a story really fast lol. Here are the before pics and a couple of after ones. My rooms not nearly anything like I want it yet(think British Colonial) but the bed was a big jump on the right direction.

Now just imagine it with all white, comfy, soft bedding, lots of pillows. Ahhhh I can see it now. Keep tuned for what I hope are more updates to my room soon. In the past its always been the last room to have anything done to (ummm truthfully nothing done to.) But Ive always wanted a sanctuary like Ive always read the bedroom is suppose to be. Not a room where everything is thrown into while trying to get the rest of the house looking decent. This move was just what I needed to actually get the motivation to make it happen!

I'm participating (finally) in Between Naps on the Porch's Metamorphosis Mondays. Go on over and check out everyone else's great projects. Warning: it can be addicting

Need to become daylight blogger

2009-11-07T22:27:00.000-08:00

I think I had this same problem last year. Of waiting until its late to blog. Which is silly because then Im tired, cant think of 3 words to string together let alone a whole post. My atrocious punctuation only becomes worse and I just want to be done. Which is even sillier because the whole point of this blog is getting to write not having to. So its a lame post tonight. But the one tomorrow, which I will write while it is still light outside, will be much better. I promise.

So in lieu of a good post tonight I invite you to go back and read some of my old posts. Maybe start at the very beginning. I actually just got totally sidetracked while finding the link above. I started reading my old posts. Which was great. Not because Im an awesome writer and got to admire myself, but because it reminded me of one of the great benefits of blogging (because I suck at journals.) Remembering. Remembering thoughts I had, remembering cute little stories of my babies, remembering why I started this blog in the first place. So yay for thinking I was going to have a 3 sentence post and instead was given a small dose or re-inspiration.

Good Night and Sweet Dreams

Time for a newish bed

2009-11-06T23:17:00.000-08:00

I love in reading in blogland all the different design and diy type blogs with some humor and family thrown in for good mix. And there's always a party somewhere. Back in the day I use to be all about the party and wanting to be a part of it no matter where it was. Guess Im not that much different in still wanting to be a part (or at least read them.) There's trash to treasure, before and after, thrifty finds, metamorphosis Mondays, etc. I've never participated in that Ive actually posted something but I think Im a little addicted to reading them!

We were raised to be thrifty and to see the Good

will as a store with potential..not something to be ashamed of or to be shunned. But these blogs are starting an addiction in me. Everything I see triggers something I saw on a post and I think "oh I could totally redo that and change into this and it would be awesome!" So many ideas..so little energy dang it. BUT and yes it is a big BUT..I actually did a big project that Ive been wanting to to forever.

Ive never been really fond of our bedroom set. Hubby picked it out. It was very light and countryish. I wanted dark and sleighbedish. But it was cheap and it matched so I really couldnt complain much.

Ten years later Im just done with it. But do not have the money now to just go buy a new set. So I summoned my inner diyer and went to work. I almost forgot to take a before picture. The middle flower thing had already been taken off and some stain applied as our test piece since it wouldnt be returning. I just put it back on for the picture.

I lightly sanded part of it but then ran some tests on our little flower thing and discovered that it wasnt really necessary. So I of course immediately quit any type of sanding.

Here's what it looked like after one coat of the stain. It totally went on a lot harder than I was expecting and looked a lot crappier than I was expecting.

I moved it to our back patio and there it sat for about 3 months because I was just

discouraged and pissed off at the bed..because you know it was all its fault.

I am proud to announce that it is all done and actually set up in my room. But you'll

have to wait until tomorrow for part II when you get to see the after pictures.

In other words I havent taken any pictures of it yet and Hubby is sleeping in it right now and I do not

think he'd want to be part of this post.

So stayed tuned tomorrow for the rest of the story.

Goth Mom

2009-11-05T20:25:00.000-08:00

As we get closer to the end of the year its only natural to look back on what we have learned and discovered in our lives throughout the year. Have we grown as a person or gotten to know the real us a little better? I hope to share more throughout the month but I would like to share one of the most important lessons I've learned this year...

Do not dye your hair black if it is not your natural color.

Didn't t that sound so much nicer than saying "hey wanna hear what a complete idiot I am?"

I've been consistently coloring my hair since I was about 18 or so. Ive probably been every shade of brown and red their is known to nature...and then some that most definitely have never been seen in the natural world. Back then, I dyed because it was fun. Now, its because I have so much gray I could go as the Bride of Frankenstein for Halloween. Going gray very early runs in the family..thanks a lot Grandma!

I was becoming bored with the same colors and wanted to try something new. Blond was out since I couldn't(or wouldn't) do that one on my own and I was too broke to go to a salon I trusted to get it done. I really wanted to do pink. I really did.

But my dear sweet hubby put the nix on that by telling me I was too old. Yup thats my sweetie.

Ben was totally bummed when I told him I wasnt going to color it pink. He thought that pink was going to be sooo cool. I wavered briefly and thought about still going with pink but then I caved and dyed it black instead. Baaaaad choice. I went for the semi-permanent kind so it would wash out, in case I didnt like it. Ben's first words were "you look Goth Mom" Oh well, twenty-four washes and it would be gone. That was almost 4 months ago. And yes, my hair is still black. Which wouldnt be bad except for the fact that I dont look good in black hair and I now have several inches of roots which of course we all know are very gray. Ive dyed my hair a couple of times a dark brown but the black still stands out. Right now its a cherry chocolate color...plus the black of course.

Guess its time to go back to a very short hairstyle for awhile. But dont you think a short pixie cut would look totally cute in a cupcake pink?

Silly or Wrong?

2009-11-04T22:01:00.000-08:00

So Ive been wondering if there are others out there who find things wrong that others find silly or entertaining. I mean I know there are lots of people who do but how about normal people like me or something as silly as competitive eating contests?

I seriously cannot sit and watch even part of a competitive eating contest without feeling physically nauseous. And not just from watching the poor table manners being exhibited.

I just have a hard time stomaching the sheer purposeful waste of food when there are people going hungry or starving everywhere. We have reached the one billion mark as to how many people in the world are starving. Maybe its the "there are starving people in Ethiopia" speech I heard a million times as a child. At the time my smart aleck remark (in my head only of course) was "please send this gross dinner to them then."

Yes we are a wasteful society. But being purposefully so seems just so wrong. Maybe if they had the emcee at one of these events be someone like this...

the contestants might just feel a little different about winning and the importance of being able to eat 68 hot dogs in 10 minutes.

Perspective

2009-11-03T22:18:00.000-08:00

I was trying to think of some witty or crafty post but then remembered something that I had been wanting to post about for awhile. This post isn't witty nor crafty. In fact, I hope it makes you cry a little, grab your loved ones in a little tighter than normal embrace, and then hopefully leave you, as it did me, a little more grateful, thankful, and feeling blessed for the life I have.

I have been following little Kate McRae's fight for awhile now. Four months ago she was diagnosed with an aggressive malignant brain tumor. Such scary words. Especially when attached to a 5 year old.

Her parents have blogged tirelessly throughout this whole ordeal. Keeping Kate in the forefront of people's minds and more importantly in their prayers.

I could write more but I hope you will visit her site and read her story from the beginning. Her parents openness throughout this all and their trust and reliance on the Lord is amazing. Theirs is not a passive faith or saying by rote "Your will be done God." They are fighting for Kate's life both on the physical and spiritual plane. They pray, beseech, beg, implore, plead and cry out to our Father continuously on behalf of their daughter. And they are not alone. As Kate's story gets out, then hopefully, more and more people will be added to the list of those already dedicated to praying for her healing and recovery.

Mom, who's right?

2009-11-02T20:19:00.000-08:00

"Yes it is."

"No its not"

Yes it is"

"Is not"

"Uh-huh"

"NO!! Moooooommmm, who's right and who's wrong? Me or Daddy? Who's right? Tell me."

This is what I had to listen to in the car tonight. About 4 different times. Little Miss Sassy-Pants was sure feeling her oats tonight and her and Hubby sure love to be antagonistic towards each other.

Feeling her oats? Sounds like I grew up on a farm and Im at least 60.

Before we we went out we were in the bathroom and she asked, out of the blue, why Daddy had to be the boss. Then she proceeded to mutter that she'd rather be the boss. Think we're going to have to rethink that whole sweetgirl nickname.

Its that time again

2009-11-01T09:49:00.000-08:00

Aren't you excited its November? You know what that means right? It means that you get to....have a post every day from me for the whole month (or at least thats the idea.) Yeah, yeah I know. I havent posted much since last November lol. But Ive been wanting to. Ive even written some posts in my head. Does that count? Yeah I didnt think so.

Slight brain detour (I think this will be a new feature this month.) I am always having these tangents that pop into my head so I think Im going to add them. We'll see how that goes. OK back to the actual tangent. How do you spell yeah. As in yes. But I rarely use yes. I like yeah. 'Cause why use the real word when you can use a lazier one. Although its not really lazier since it has more letters. Unless you spell it ya but that just doesnt work for me. But Im always worried that when I spell yeah that someone is going to think that I meant yay. Does anyone else ever even think about that or is it just another one of the really weird things about me?

Im very excited to be posting again. Ive really missed it. But once I had stopped it was hard to just pop in and start writing random things again. I felt like I should give an accounting of myself and why I had been so neglectful. But yippee, its November and I can just start! They havent given a theme for the month yet but I will be sharing just regular crazy life stuff, some crafting and sewing hopefully, and my newest interest, decorating and diy kind of stuff. Making things look good on a budget. And I mean cheap...like almost free cheap :)

Alright then. We've gotten the party started so I'll talk to you tomorrow.

I have it bad

2009-04-16T14:38:00.000-07:00

There is no way we could do it. I dont think that I could physically handle it. We are beyond that stage and moving forward. Hubby would grow a second head just like the one he keeps looking on my shoulder for. Knowing all this doesnt really help.

I.
have.
baby.
fever.

Bad!

I think Im over it and then I hear that a friend is pregnant.
Im over it and then another friend is trying to get pregnant.
Im over it and then I hear Ava telling Ben that Im pregnant (she must be channeling my secret desires.)

I know we are not going to have another baby. So why do find myself calculating my due date if I got pregnant now?
I am already so tired that having a baby would put me in an energy state that would probably be comprable to being in a coma. So why do I see a picture of a chubby baby and feel this tug..this urge..this yearning?

Baby fever sucks.

Baby fever is depressing.

Baby fever is entertaning.

Baby fever is dangerous.

2008-11-29T09:46:00.000-08:00

I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving. Ours was ok minus some stressed mom and naughty kids moments (with tears on all sides,) Hubby getting called into work briefly and Ava sleeping through dinner. But it ended up well. Dinner was good and then Ben and I went on a nature walk together in the rain. We came home, Ava was awake and then we all had pie together (minus Grammy who was upstairs taking a nap.) When asked what he was thankful for Ben replied he was thankful for his toys and his family..in that order.

I have actually two different set of pictures to post. I was going to save one for tomorrow but as we will be in the car driving for about 13 hours I thought Id do it all now. I have a million and three things to do (like pack everything) but Im sitting here instead. Because I like to procrastinate...alot.

Here are the treats that I made for Ben's class. They had a whole week of learning about Native Americans which was great for Ben because he is very interested in all that (which is why Im hoping to be able to make him a tipi for Christmas.)

*Side note: I always thought it was teepee but apparently its tipi. So much for my good spelling eh?*

These are Tipi cupcakes treats. There is a cupcake inside the sugar cone, pretzels for poles, and melted chocolate and green sprinkles for grass. I got the idea from These are a few of my favorite things. I used the idea of one of her readers and used a pan with wadded up tinfoil to keep the cones upright. My problem was that I tried to bake way too many at once (because I was in a huge hurry) and so the baking time was a little off, some done before others, etc.

They were very last minute (ie -the day of...with about 2 hours to do everything, including buy the stuff) and did not turn out as cute. I really wanted the leaf sprinkles but there was nothing like that still available. But now I know and Im going to buy them early so I can make them again. Even though they were rushed I still thought they were pretty cute and the kids loved them which is what really counts. Ive been really trying to dampen my inner perfectionist when it comes to crafts etc. Especially on something like this where I know that the kids will like them no matter what and its really just me that has the issue with the final presentation.

The next thing I have to share is something I made for my nephew. So Lu if you dont want to know what he's getting stop reading now.

Sew,Mama, Sew! had a link for this awesome Rocket Man. When I saw it I just had to make it. Its so stinkin cute. And I love how it turned out! It has a few issues but again its that whole perfectionist thing. I think for my first soft toy it turned out pretty well. Although it did make me realize (or remember) that while my machine sewing is pretty good, my hand sewing skills really need some help. Which is weird because I can crossstitch fine and embroider somewhat but my regular hand sewing is pretty crappy. But anyhoo..here are the pictures of the rocket and little astronaut that I made.

We are leaving first thing in the morning for our vacation. I might post while Im gone but probably not. Thank you for reading along with me this month and Im hoping that I will keep up the semi habit that I formed this month and post on a regular basis. And Im hoping that in December I will have a whole bunch more crafts/gifts pictures to share with you..because that means that Im doing what Im suppose to! Alright off I go to do laundry and pack.

Busy Slacker

2008-11-26T20:11:00.000-08:00

I've been totally slacking in my posts. So much for posting everyday. But Im not going to beat myself up for it because Ive done way better this month than ever before so thats a positive. Although Ive been slacking in my posts Ive actually been quite busy in my craftiness. I actually got a couple of Christmas presents done and some other things as well. I cant tell you all in one post because then Id be out of things to talk about again.

Ive had somewhat of a time frame on getting items done. I had to make something for B's teacher first because he goes on track break starting tomorrow and wont be back until after the first of the year. Then I wanted to get all of my "Oregon presents" done before we drove up there this coming up Sunday. As some of you know I am notoriously bad about getting things mailed on time..even if its all packaged up. I just cant seem to make it to the stinkin post office. Well I am not going to have everything done but I did get some of it done so Im actually pretty pleased with myself. If I can stay this on track for awhile I wont be running around like a chicken with my head cut off at the last minute. But dont hold your breath on that one.

For your viewing pleasure here is the tote bag I made for Ben's teacher. I used fabric by Alexander Henry and a tutorial from here. What do you think? Its big enough to fit a couple of thin binders in. I was pretty pleased as the only other bag Ive made was the Diego backpack that I made for A's bday. Which leads me to a quick little side note. B was very impressed with the bag I made and wants me to make him a backpack "that he wears on his side" (ie messenger bag) and I am to use flame fabric. So I just might need to add that to my Christmas to do list. Ok enough already. Here are a couple of pictures and Im off to bed. Yes its early but Ive got lots of cooking tomorrow and Im worn out from making tipi cupcakes (which I will post pictures of tomorrow so check in.)

Black Friday Excitement

2008-11-21T21:49:00.000-08:00

I got the flyer today in the mail. Black Friday in next week and all the stores are gearing up for one of the biggest shopping days of the year. In the past Ive gone out on the day after Thanksgiving and done a little shopping. Nothing crazy like waiting in lines starting at o'dark thirty but I do use the sales and early start time as an excuse to go and do some shopping by myself. And Im sure this year, things being as they are, the sales will be even more appreciated.

I had kind of forgotten that the "Big Day" was next week until I got the flyer in the mail. I got giddily excited about all the sale items. I found myself thinking that maybe I should get up even a little earlier so I could be one of the first people in the store. There were some really good sales..and coupons too! The store? Joanns Fabrics of course. Yes, I know Im a big dork. Todays events totally proved that to myself. Because I really was excited about the flyer! So much so that I temporarily forgot that Im suppose to be Christmas shopping for other people not myself. Althoooooough, technically, if I buy fabric to make other people things, then it really is Christmas shopping, right?

Tooth fairy duty

2008-11-18T20:46:00.000-08:00

After much wiggling, whining, and screaming at me to get my fingers out of his mouth..Ben finally lost his first tooth. He looks so stinkin cute! I just keep watching him talk so I can see the little empty space in his teeth. I remember being excited as he got his first teeth and now Im excited to see him lose them. I did learn something about myself as we waited for this tooth to fall out. I am as fascinated by looe teeth as I was when I was a kid and the loose tooth was mine. I was constantly wanting to wiggle Ben's tooth myself and kept trying to bribe him so he would let me pull it out. It did finally fall out, in the middle of class of all places, and then we moved on to the next great part of losing a tooth..the tooth fairy.

You would think that since this tooth has been loose forever that I would totally be prepared for the tooth fairy's expected arrival. Not so. Of course, if you know how I like to procrastinate you are totally not surprised. About the time we are sending Ben to bed is about the time I start thinking about tooth fairy duties. Then the whole mom-guilt-I-can-be -crafty-craziness starts. Its his first tooth! I should do something special, something more than shove the $1 under his pillow like dad wants to do. And this is where is comes in handy to have several different craft interests..'cause that means I have alot of crap laying around that I can use for last minute stuff (OH NO! I just totally sounded like my mom in that sentence..she would love it.) I made Ben a little tooth pillow shaped like a tooth. It has his name embroidered on the front and the back has a little pocket where the tooth/tooth money can be put. Of course while Im doing all this Hubby is just rolling his eyes at me and shaking his head at me. I had wanted to put the gold Sacajawea coins in the pillow but we only had one of those so we went with half dollars. Im not sure what I had against paper money but I just felt like it was suppose to be coins! We agreed that $2 was a good amount for his first tooth and from then on he'd get $1. I went upstairs, took out the envelope I had sealed his tooth in from under his pillow and slipped his new little tooth fairy pillow in its place. Thank goodness he's a heavy sleeper.

At this point Hubby had gone to bed long ago. I then decided that the tooth fairy should leave him a little personal note. So out came the markers,glue, and glitter. As the glue & glitter wouldnt dry for awhile, I just propped that note up on the counter downstairs so Ben would see it when he came down.

Fast forward to the morning..Ben loved it all and thought it was all great..which caused me to give Hubs the "see I told you so" look. Fast forward to me taking Ben to school. I park the car and start to walk him in. The very first child we encounter runs up to Ben and says "I lost a tooth!" and points to a gap in her mouth. Ben, equally excited, says "me too!" Then the girl declares "I got $20!" TWENTY DOLLARS! Are you people kidding me? I knew we were on the cheaper side of the doling out money but really? Don't people know we have a recession going on?

Ben's reply was great. "Holy Cow, 20 bucks! I only got $2" and then he walked away. I was worried as we kept walking that he was going to be upset as he kept muttering something about $20. "You know, different people get different things. She got more money but you got $2 and a cool new tooth pillow." He looks up at me smiling his little gap toothed smile and quite sincerely said "And I got a note from the tooth fairy too!" And thats just one more reason that I love my little guy.

Silent Sunday

2008-11-16T19:23:00.000-08:00

Im totally stealing a friend's idea and making Sunday a picture only post. Sunday is actually more like Saturday for our family since its Hubby's first day off of his "weekend." So it is the one day of the weekend where everyone is home. We have family time, church, etc. So on Sundays I will just post a photo or two. Some might be recent but mostly I'll look through the older pictures and post some of my favorites. Enjoy.

October 2005

He loves me!

2008-11-15T22:34:00.000-08:00

A little moment to prove that big brothers can be sweet sometimes:

I was finishing getting Ava ready to leave the house this morning. She had a cute outfit on and I was braiding her hair. I finished and she stood up from the couch. Ben looked her over and then declared loudly "Ava looks pretty!" She got the happiest smile on her face and said "Ben loves me!" as she gave him a big hug. Ben kept the love fest going by returning her hug...gently. I reminded Ava that Ben always loves her..he just likes to tease and torture her alot too. And then I made sure to point out to Ben how happy his little compliment made her and wasnt that nice? He smiled and agreed but then of course had to add "and I like to tease her sometimes too." Oh brother!

Committed

2008-11-14T21:31:00.000-08:00

Im committed to this blog y'all. I got up out of bed to write this. Which might or not might not be the reason I felt the need to imagine that opening line with a southern drawl. But..I havent taken my Ambien yet so things shouldnt get too crazy. I have absolutely nothing to share of any substance or wit and am posting for postings sake. Exciting for you as a reader, I know.

I can't even think of a witty story. I was just sooo tired today. It was one of those days. The days where you feel wiped out but think you're just being a little melodramatic. And then you look in the mirror....and scare yourself. Even though you actually applied makeup this morning. Yep, it was one of those kind of days. I know I really looked bad because I came upstairs tonight and Hubby was ironing his clothes for tomorrow. A task that he usually tries to con me into doing for him. "You're ironing?" Was I hallucinating? (Ok thats really not fair to him because he does iron his clothes alot..but it sounds better for the story the other way dont you think?) "Well you looked really tired so I thought I'd do it." Wow! I knew I looked bad but obviously it was alot worse than even I thought.

I am now off to bed. I do apologize for the pathetic post. The only other mildly entertaining story I had was about the sad state of my underwear but there such things as sharing too much.

But it was so pretty

2008-11-13T20:16:00.000-08:00

I bought Ava a Christmas Dress at Costco. Odd place I know, but it was so purty. And I knew that if I waited too long it would not be there later. Because you know how they have limited numbers of some things and you snooze you lose. So I bought it.

And then I felt guilty. Because we are suppose to be really saving money. And only buying necessities. Because besides Christmas shopping and all that jazz we also have in November life insurance payments and car registration due. Did I mention how pretty the dress was?

I returned the dress. It occurred to me that I really didnt need to buy a fancy dress because we dont dress fancy for Christmas. And I didnt have any parties that she needed to be Miss Fancy Pants at and....because the dress didn't fit. It made the decision so much easier and less painful. And I probably wouldnt have made the wise choise to return it otherwise. Besides, she can wear the dress I bought her last year for Christmas card pics.

Whats that you say? You didnt get a card last year from us? Here's a little hint how that photo shoot went.

It pretty much went downhill from there. The good thing is that I bought that dress a little big so it still fits this year. So be looking in a mailbox near you for a card from us featuring a hopefully smiling child in a cute green dress. Oh the other good thing about the botched photoshoot? I still have the cards that the pictures go in and they dont say "Happy Holidays 2007" or anything like that so I can totally use them this year. Woohoo.

But does He love it?

2008-11-12T21:00:00.000-08:00

We were driving in the car today and Ava was chatting away a mile a minute..as usual. Her topics of conversation would vary wildly from one minute to the next-I have not idea where she inherited that from. Certainly not me. Hubby has quite often asked me to explain my though patterns to him so he can see how I arrived at a new topic from the previous one we were discussing. It is often a wildly convoluted and barely decipherable path.

We were talking about something and then Ava asked where Heaven was (I think she was looking out her window at the clouds.) Before I could even start to answer she was ready with her next, and more important, question.

"Does Jesus like pink? Do you think He loves pink? I hope He loves pink! Because some boys like pink you know."

She seemed genuinely concerned about the question so I felt I should answer something. I told her that I figured since God made everything that He also made the color pink so I was sure that He loved it.

"Oh good. I love pink too."

Way to go, Dad

2008-11-11T20:02:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Hubby's poor tv viewing choices while he was watching the kids I am having to say things that I never dreamed of to Ava. This is my favorite one from today.

"Its not going to snow in your room and there is not a yeti in there. Now go take a nap."

Thank you Sci-Fi channel.
Thank you b-movie Yeti
Thanks again Hubs!

Im soo cold

2008-11-10T18:50:00.000-08:00

Its like 60 degrees out and Im freezing my butt off. Which would be fine if my butt was really going to fall off and it wasnt just a figure of speech. I know, I know..Im a big wimp. But seriously. Im cold. And Im inside, fully dressed-including shoes and socks, with a light blanket on top of everything else. I think Im going to have to go lay in bed to warm up. I think that my discomfort is in a large part due to the arthritis in my back. Once it starts to get cold my back just aches and aches and thats all I seem to be able to think about...that. I. am. cold! If the kids were asleep, I'd go take a bath. But theyre not and they would just bug me incessantly. I could lock the door but Ava would just keep knocking until I got out and let her in. Actually now that I think about it, it is almost bedtime for them. I mean it is bedtime, right? Once my body adjusts to the weather change its not so bad. For those of you thinking "ya right, Im remember the tier sweater," just hush. I dont want to hear it lol. Let me delude myself that I'll get warmer once I adjust to the new fall weather.

Goodbye to the king

2008-11-09T22:52:00.000-08:00

Ben & Tut

Ava & Tut

Ava sharing cheese & love with Tut

You were our first baby. You've been a part of our lives for more than 8 years. We've had you for a long time but I thought I still had more time with you. I was never that big of an animal person until we got you. Here are some things that I totally loved about you and will miss.

You thought you were a dog. You fetched, went to the door when the doorbell rang, and loved to be patted hard like a dog does.

You could open doors. And when we moved to a different house with new doorknobs you were a little pissed that you couldn't open those..but it didnt keep you from constantly trying.

You always laid on my side. Even when Hubby drug you over to his side you would promptly get up and come back over to mine. I miss having you lay against my side and being able to feel you purr.

I love that you were so tough. Even a large police k-9 new better than to mess with you.

You were so tolerant of Ava and would let her carry you around even though you were almost strangled in the process.

As much as I would complain about your mewing if you were hungry and how I would have to escort you to your food bowl..to show you there was food in there...it really didnt bother me..because you were Tut.

You were such a good hunter. I couldnt feel to sorry for the birds that you caught because for pete's sake you were wearing a collar with a bell. Although I didnt really appreciate you bringing the birds inside to show off.

The whole family misses you. Its been almost 2 weeks since you disappeared. We like to tell ourselves that maybe you're taking a vacation at a quiet family's house for awhile. But I think Ava knows the truth and has put it the best.

"Tut is in heaven and he is Jesus's kitty now. Jesus likes petting Tut."

Im no rat

2008-11-07T19:42:00.000-08:00

We had playgroup today at our house. It was lots of fun as usual and as usual someone had to puke/poop on my rug. No really. My house gives off some kind of vibe. Because I know it doesnt happen on a regular basis at other peoples houses. And I kid you not..it happens every-single-time at mine. Probably because Im one of the least likely people to freak out about it. I mean after orange stains from Ava spilling dog shampoo and strawberry milk stains from a tipped over cup (which in hind sight should have had a lid) whats with a little baby puke. So not a problem.

Sometime during the playgroup Ava got injured. Do I know this because she came downstairs crying or worse yet made me run up the stairs? Nope. She comes down for a snack and I immediately notice the large purple bruise under her eye and on her eyelid.

"What happened to your eye? Are you ok?"
"I dont want to talk about it." (really thats what she said)
"Did someone hit you?"
"Nope"
"Did you fall"
"Nope"
"Did someone throw something at you?"
"Nope"
"Ava what happened to your eye?"
"I dont remember."
Which is the preschooler equivelant of I was in the shower, sleeping, while reading a book excuse (all favorite inmate excuses when questioned about an assault in case you were wondering.)

All the boys when questioned agreed that Ava either fell going up or downstairs. Pretty good as they didnt have much time to get their alibi together.

I never did get a straight answer from Ava. Hubby was able to get a little more out of her when he got home by subtly threatening the withholding of goldfish rations. Apparently she was laying on the floor and someone stepped on her eye as they were sliding down from the top bunk. But she could not identify the culprit as her eye was closed and then "the whole shoe was on my eye so I couldnt see." She did say which two suspects were wearing shoes at the time but once again refused/had amnesia as to which one it actually was...because her eyes were closed. I'll say this, the girl knows how to stick to a story. Im just wondering as to why she was so set on not revealing what really happened when she was clearly the victim? Whats the preschool threat equivalent to cement shoes or sleeping with the fishes..or since we live in Las Vegas..taking a long walk in the desert? Apparently I might need to look into that.

I want to see more cowboys

2008-11-06T21:46:00.001-08:00

We took the kids to the bull riding finals tonight. Ava was excited to see the cowboys and the "big daddy cows." Actually once she saw the bulls she didnt mention them again. She did ask several times, during breaks or delays, when she was going to see some more cowboys. Can't say I blame her. Slap a cowboy hat on a man and there's just something about him. Of course with her, she just likes cowboys. He could be 85 and if he's wearing a cowboy hat she's impressed. We talked in the car about Ben riding bulls when he got a little older. Hubby asked Ava is she wanted to ride bulls. Ben replied for her..girls dont ride bulls-they just hand out tshirts and stuff. Thanks scantily clad Jack Daniels girls for giving my son that wonderful impression. And Im obviously going to have to work on the "girls can do anything" speech. Ava, however, could have cared less. She doesnt want to ride bulls..she wants to ride horses when she gets older. And then she clarified..and when Im this age too!

Thank you Pottery Barn

2008-11-05T20:10:00.000-08:00

I have always really liked Pottery Barn. Or should I say Pottery Barn's catalog. As much as Ive drooled or coveted certain things I dont think that Ive ever actually purchased anything from them. Mostly because everything is so stinkin expensive. Their kids' catalog always has tons of cute ideas but at 200 bucks for a play tepee its once again just a fun catalog to look at but not actually buy from. But this year, in all my planned craftiness, I actually tore out a whole bunch of pages for ideas of things I want to make.

The cute autumn garland made out of felt leaves? So totally easy to make..even if you dont sew.

At Pottery Barn it costs $69. You could make it for very little out of pocket cost with a spool of ribbon, some felt, and some embroidery thread. If you arent feeling like doing any stitching at all then you could break out the puffy paint and the hot glue gun and you're good to go.

I love this tepee. And so does Ben. But like I said before, totally not in my budget.
Ive got to find the link again but I found a tutorial awhile back that shows how to make one of these out of a painters tarp and some bamboo poles, both of which you can find at Home Depot or other similar stores. Don't tell Ben but I think this is going to be one of his Christmas presents.

Im redoing the kids' playroom and bedroom. So Im always looking for new ideas for both of those rooms. I really like the idea of monogram letters for their room..maybe something like this..ok maybe a little simpler.
But instead of spending $69 (which seems to be a favorite price for items) one of these could easily be made from contact paper and an exacto knife. Ive been pondering on doing some sort of vinyl cling for their room but they are all so expensive..at least the ones I like are lol. But apparently you can buy contact paper in all kinds of plain colors and its just the right stickiness to be used on the walls but still removed later. As this is not going to be a Christmas present I'll probably revisit this ideas once all the holiday craziness is over.

I want one or two of these for the playroom and just might need to figure out how to make them. I know their are patterns out their for beanbags which could be modified fairly easily

And lastly, this thing is so stinkin cute that I think Ava needs one. Its not a simple straight forward one so it would take some work doing figuring out the pattern. In other words it probably wont get made but we'll see. Don't you just love it?

So thats my craft redo ideas for today. Unfortunately Im not as super crafty as all the people who make tutorials on how to make things or together enough like others where I actually put the helpful links to the ideas but Im working on it. Baby steps, people, baby steps.

Well lets hope

2008-11-04T20:13:00.000-08:00

As this presidential race finally winds down I am finally going to way in. Vaguely. As Obama appears to have the election in the bag I can only hope that he will deliver even part of what has been promised. That the man that has been projected to us is the man that he is. I hope we do have positive change...because change in and of itself is not always good. Maybe you are thinking that things are so bad that any change is good. Oh my friends that is so not the case. I remember a local election for sheriff many years ago. Things were bad. We had hope as we saw the man we had campaigned for elected. Change was coming! And boy howdy did it. The man was not what he seemed. Not what we thought. And things became many times worse than before. Maybe that is why Iva had a hard time with this election? Maybe things seem too good to be true and Im just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I sincerely hope that is not the case and that we will have more and more positive things happen for our country.

Drats

2008-11-03T21:00:00.000-08:00

Obviously I hadnt thought things all the way through. As part of my NaBloPoMo I was going to document all my craftiness as I tried to have more of a homemade Christmas this year. And to an extent I still can. I just can't post what Im maybe going to make my sister, nephew, bil, etc. You like how I threw that maybe in there? We'll see if my ambitions meet reality. I do know that I need to get my rear in gear and actually start getting some stuff done.

Todays post was totally lame I admit. Sad that the pathetic posts have already started arriving. But Im giving myself a little bit of leeway to try and get in the groove of writing each day. I think the hardest part is going to be figuring out when to actually write. In the morning I think I'll wait till the evening and by time evening comes around my brain is malt 0'meal so that obviously isnt going to work. Speaking of malt o' meal..I love that stuff and am glad that the cool weather is finally going to be here (it was 79 today) so I can enjoy it more often. Are you wondering malt o' what? Its like Cream of Wheat. And I'll go through phases where I could eat it a couple of times a day at least. Anyhoo back to my writing dilema. Im going to try writing in the morning or early afternoon (ie naptime) to see if that works any better. With that said, I'll see you in the morning.

That's not awesome!

2008-11-02T21:01:00.000-08:00

We had a weird Halloween moment that I had to share. Prior to Halloween the local news channels ran a couple of segments about how law enforcement was going around to all the sex offenders and reminding them that they are suppose to have nothing to do with trick or treaters, children, etc. And we as parents need to be vigilant, go trick or treating with our kids and all that jazz. As Im not about to let my 3 & 6 year old go out by themselves its not a reminder that I needed..but hey thanks for the heads up anyways.

So we're out trick or treating. I walk up to each house with the kids but usually stand back at the beginning of a house's walkway and let them do their thing. A sad commentary of todays society is that I found my self inching way closer if a man answered the door by himself. We got to one house and a lady answered the door. Since it was a woman my radar wasnt instantly up and it took me a few seconds to realize that she didnt have a candy bowl in her hand. I started to get a little perplexed as I saw her reach into Ava's bag and I heard the woman say "Where's the candy?" She rummaged through Ava's bag as I finally decided that I probably should get my butt up to the door and see what this sketchy woman was all about. She handed Ava a dollar bill as I fake cheerfully pulled my children away from her porch. Ava was holding the money and seemed pretty happy because while she hasnt actually figured out that she can spend her money on things she does like the stuff. Ben was looking a little weirded out so I was all "oh look, she got some $$ instead of candy. Thats awesome." He got this pissed look on his face and said very indignantly "that lady took Ava's candy and then gave her money. Thats not awesome! She took her candy!" I had seen the lollipop in the woman's hand but hadnt quite realized until he said that that the woman had taken a lollipop out of Ava's bag and then given her the dollar. Not awesome indeed. Although a buck for a lollipop isnt too bad of an exchange rate. So just a word of warning. Be on the lookout for candy stealing ladies next year.

All month long

2008-11-01T10:27:00.000-07:00

You'll be seeing much more of me on here. More posting I mean. I signed up for NaBloPoMo (which I can never type right for some reason.) If you have no idea what that is, it stands for National Blog Posting Month. The whole idea of it is to post every day for the month of November. Yes, I realize that it will be quite a stretch as the last time I posted was in Sept and I think 3 days in a row is my record for continuous posting. But hey, if you're going to aim you might as well aim high. Now I am not promising read-worthy posts every day. I can't promise that they will all be interesting..but I'll give it a try. My friends Lauren did NaBloPoMo last year and I have to say I was sad when Nov. was over because she went back to slacking on her posts..ok, not slacking, just not posting every day like I had gotten use to. So hopefully you will be able to get use to me posting every day and maybe it will even become a habit.

I was trying to decide if that should just be my post for the day (because you know, I should pace myself) but Im feeling like writing so here's a little post-Halloween something.

I have to admit there are things I really like about Halloween. Its not one of my favorite holidays but there are some things about it that I am really fond of.

*Pre-Halloweenish time (ie Autumn) means the start of all things pumpkin. I love me some pumpkin. Pumpkin muffins, pumpkin pancakes, pumpkin bread, and of course Starbucks' Pumpkin Spice Lattes.

*Getting the kids' Halloween costumes ready fills the previously unrecognized need in myself to be a costume designer. This year I didnt actually sew one of my own children's costumes (not counting some last minute impromptu mouse ears) so I had to volunteer to sew costumes for a friend's kids. Dishes in the sink? A husband with no clean underwear? Too bad, I have to sew!

*Halloween Candy (yes both words need to be capitalized.) Candy gained from trick or treating is one of a parent's least realized assets. I've heard of parents having their kids trade the candy for toys, throw it away (seriously?) and other crazy ideas. I want that stuff to last as long as possible. First, the unwritten rule is that all chocolate belongs to me. To be eaten by me in secret when the kids are in the other room and not realizing that Im rifling through their stash. Except Tootsie Rolls...I dont think those are really chocolate..just chocolate colored, which is such a tease. And I dont want to hide their bags of candy away so they'll forget about it. Why? Bribes people. Its all about the bribes. Or incentives as I like to call them..it sounds so much nicer. You want a piece of candy? Ok go pick up the shoes by the door and carry them upstairs. And it actually gets done! Dirty clothes picked up? Toys put in their baskets? Being nice to your sister? Candy is the magic word in our house. But there is a problem in that if we did it all the time the candy thrill would wear off. So we have to really enjoy Halloween Candy while its here...at least until we can start threatening about Santa..which has its own set of problems.

Pants in Heaven

2008-09-13T11:09:00.000-07:00

BigB loves to talk about Heaven. Sweetgirl does too but then she'll start crying becaues she doesnt want to go there yet. Which is exactly what BigB did at her age as well. I always counter the crying with a "not till we're super old..even older than Poppy" comment. I hope God is taking notes on the no dying till we're all older than Methuselah part. Anyways, I digress.

BigB likes to fantasize about Heaven (he'll get to play Playstation forever) and also has a million questions. Here are a few from our most recent bedtime conversation.

BB: What if one of Satan's bad guys kills us in Heaven? Do we go to a 2nd Heaven?
Me: No bad guys are allowed! No dying, crying, being sick or ever having to say goodbye

BB : What will we do in Heaven? Im just going to play playstation all the time
Me: Im not exactly sure what we'll do. Maybe we will still all have jobs, but doing things we love. Maybe you could be one of God's warriors (we had also just been talking about Guardian Angels with fiery swords to try and help alleviate random fears.)
BB: Oh yeah! Im definitely going to be a warrior! With a big sword!!

BB: How long does it take to get to Heaven? How long does it take to turn all into bones after you die?
Me: Long explanation about how our body is just our shell and our spirit will go right to heaven, etc.

BB: What is Jesus going to wear in Heaven?
Me: What?
BB: What is He going to wear in Heaven? I hope He's not wearing a dress. I think He should wear pants , not a dress like in all the pictures!
Me: Come here and let me give you a big hug. You crack me up.

So what do you think? Is Jesus going to being wearing pants in Heaven?

Why craiglsist should supply spellcheck

2008-09-01T08:50:00.000-07:00

Ok we already know that Im somewhat of a spelling snob. And really with all the spellchecks available there really is no excuse for bad spelling. Although I must admit as I get older I seem to be forgetting how to spell words once in awhile..oh the horror! And even though I dislike misspelled words I do not correct people...I am reminding you because it is definitely not ok to point out any of my mistakes should the highly unlikely occur (ok now Im just being snotty ha.)

I love Craiglsist (see above linked post.) There are awesome deals to be found. And hours of time wasting fun to be had. But I do have a few pet peeves about it.

*First- If you are going to post a picture of your item for sale, why in the world would you post one that is so dark, fuzzy, and at such an odd angle that if a description wasnt also listed I would have no idea what it was? This irks me every time. I know, Im petty. But sometimes its just the little things that get to me.

*Second & Lastly (see its a short list-Im only mildly petty)
Spellcheck your listing for the love of all that is good in the world...please!! If you have no idea how the word is spelled pick a different one. I must admit that some of the misspellings I have come across lately have actually made me laugh though.

-rott or rot iron instead of wrought iron
-mid-evil instead of medieval
-armor,armour,amour and many more that I cant remember on this one

I'll give you that armoire is a hard word to spell. But if you're online then you have access to an online dictionary or spellcheck. A thought just occurred to me. What if some people dont care for spelling rules just like I dont care about punctuation? Gasp! Im sure that cant be true..who out there could really not care about spelling??

Not bored

2008-08-29T16:23:00.000-07:00

My son is going to kill me when he gets older and hears about all the embarassing stories I've told about him. But thats years from now and if I play it cool he'll never even know.

Last night we were visiting at my uncle's timeshare vacation condo here in town. It was nice for the kids to play in the big pool and who would have thought that a waterfall hot tub would feel nice on a 110 degree day. But it did...really. And not just to someone like me, who has an unusually high intolerance to cold. There were other people enjoying it was well. Ok I do admit they looked like they were all over 50 but whatever. It was nice!

We were back up in the condo relaxing and BigB had to go the bathroom. After he was in there for awhile he yelled for me to come in. I thought he just wanted me to "check" and make sure that he had wiped well. Too much info I know but thank God he wipes himself now. And Im not taking the Lord's name in vain...I really do thank God that he wipes himself now. Anyhoo it turns out that was not why he called me into the bathroom...he was just lonely and decided that the bathroom was creepy (his new favorite word) and I should come entertain him. He gestured magnanimously at the edge of the tub with his best Vanna White handsweep and told me that I could "sit if I wanted to stay." Why the heck did he think I wanted to sit in the now smelly bathroom with him?

Then I noticed it.

"B, dont play with yourself while you're sitting on the toilet for pete's sake."

"Well, at least I have something to do while I sit here."

Males are seriously a different species entirely.

Babies and other such craziness

2008-08-28T13:06:00.000-07:00

My sister made a stop in town on her cross country move from North Carolina to Oregon. Thank goodness she's back on this side of the country and is at least within driving distance. I mean it is a very long drive but is is doable in one day..if you buy enough bribes for the kids to keep them occupied for 14 hours.

We were also lucky in that it was my nephew Little P's 1st birthday while they were here. He's so stinking cute and the kids both just loved him to death. Sweetgirls mothering insticts kicked in and she kept wanting to carry him or have him sit on her lap. Except now she keeps bothering me for a little sister. Because, and I quote, " a little sister would be so cute" and because she keeps on insisting that she wants a "real baby" to push in her stroller. Anyone want to hire a 3 year old babysitter so she can get her baby fix?

The topic of babies is what I actually intended to write about. My sister and I were talking about babies. Her and her hubby would like another but they are talking about adopting. Fertility is not an issue but just more the fact of there are babies without homes so why not adopt. She was talking about how they would like to adopt a girl to round out their family. And then out of the blue BigB pipes in totally matter of factly:

"You can have Sweetgirl."

Ahhh brotherly love.

New Project

2008-08-04T12:13:00.001-07:00

I am very excited about my latest project...or what is going to be my latest project once I actually start it. I am going to have a sewing room! This is where my sewing stuff is right now

Besides having to pick someone very skinny to sit in the chair that goes between the two tables and the lovely aesthetics of it all, t has worked ok. I especially like the elegant touch that the cardboard boxes and the constant presence of the ironing board add to our dining area. The silly thing is that we have a whole huge loft upstairs that is not being used at all...except to hold Annies kennel and an unused, dusty entertainment center. I tried to make that my sewing area but it didnt really work because it was too far away from downstairs during the day...so I couldnt keep an eye on the kids. And at night it was too close to their rooms...so they would want to watch me instead of sleeping. And then I got a brilliant idea.

Move the playroom up to the loft. Here is what the playroom looks like right now. Ok not right now because this is not a picture from today...and today the room is very messy.

So Im going to move all this upstairs (ok Hubby is actually moving the furniture but you know what I mean) and make this room my sewing/craft/girlie room. While maybe not the perfect choice (its kinda odd to have people walk into your sewing room when they first walk in the door) Im still very very excited about it. Because if I have a whole room then I really have to be more serious about my sewing right? Plus I get to decorate it however I want. I already asked Hubby if I could make it girlie and he said that was fine. I'd like to do it kind of in a country cottage/shabby chic kind of thing. The rooms big enough that Id like to also have one little corner with a comfy chair or two so it could kind of be a sitting room and sewing room.

Of course the first instinct is to go buy crap to put in it. But Im refraining...for now. At least until I actually clear out all the stuff and move it upstairs. Im keeping an eye on craigslist and garage sales for the perfect, cheap, furniture that I want to add. The good thing about the whole cottage style is that slipcovers, repainted furniture, etc fit in perfectly. And you can get great bargains on craigslist if you arent looking for "perfect" stuff. Heck, actually you can get perfect stuff at quite a bargain. Las Vegas is a great city for craiglsist I think because people are always moving here and away from here so theres lots of goodies.

Which leads me to quick detour but does have some relevance. I went to an estate sale the other day and got tons of wonderful stuff. I bought 2 older rhinestoned perfume atomomizers. They were only about $3 each. I bought them with the thought of reselling them on ebay and making a few bucks. I could only find a few similar to what I have and they are selling between $60-$100! More of a profit than I was thinking so hopefully they will sell that well. Then I can use that money to purchase things for "my room."

So keep tuned for progress updates on the project. Im hoping that actually posting something about it will give me that little last incentive I need to actually start hauling toys up the stairs.

Pretty Crayons

2008-05-29T21:54:00.000-07:00

Im not sure who had more fun with our little craft project...me or the kids.

And I know I havent been actually writing much these past few posts but Ive been having fun each day trying to figure how to use pictures instead of just words. Just a phase Im enjoying right now.

Freckles and all

2008-05-27T22:38:00.000-07:00

In case you haven't seen a picture of me lately I thought you might enjoy seeing what I look like these days.

Todays Jeopardy question

2008-05-23T15:59:00.000-07:00

Answer:

The ledge opening above the couch

Sweetgirl's Dresser

Question: What are things Ive told BigB not to climb on top of today?

Reprieve

2008-05-22T23:10:00.001-07:00

I am so enjoying each little minute of our mild weather right now. We've had wonderful May weather and then it spiked to around 109 for a couple days. In my mind I was groaning..I just am not quite ready to be constantly sweaty.

And then, a reprieve. Today was 70! Can you believe it. 70 at the end of May in Vegas. How wonderful is that. I know the heat is just around the corner but Im going to savor this last little bit of cool...and enjoy having one last month of normal electric bills to boot. Plus I can get away with long pants for a couple more days which means one more thing. Yep, I can put off shaving my legs on a regular basis just a little bit longer.

On the backburner

2008-05-21T10:48:00.000-07:00

I haven't abandoned my blog. Really. Its just on the back burner. Although considering the length of time its been on the back burner whatever is in the pot is probably a big burnt mess by now. Yeah I know that analogy doesnt really work but its the best I have at the moment. Stress does funny things to us doesnt it? For me, it envelops my brain in a complete fog unless I am focusing on "the" situation..you know, the stress causing one. Im freakishly clear minded when it comes to thinking about all the things that are causing me stress. Its the rest of my life and world that seem just a little bit off and blurry. I find myself driving around in somewhat of a daze. Kind of like those first few weeks after you find out your pregnant (NO that is one thing I am not stressed about!) Your mind is on the future and fun baby things and the rest of the world just kind of fades away a little. At least right now Im not running stop signs like I did when I was pregnant....cause thats real safe right?
I wish I was one of those freakish people who cant eat when they are stressed out. Because wouldnt that just be so awful to not have an appetite and lose tons of weight because you are so stressed? Maybe I should add those people to my "I hate" list like the Lexus drivers. No, not me. I definitely do not lose my appetite. My brain seems to think if it causes me to constantly stuff crap into my mouth maybe Ill feel better. It seems to forget that gaining weight is not one of my goals and will most likely not make me feel better. They have some Alli weight loss pill things out there. Maybe that would help the stress eating. But those can give you diarrhea and that doesnt sound like a very fun trade off. And not very calm inducing either.
I just sat here for about 2 minutes trying to think of something else witty to say and realized Im all out. Anymore and Ill just start sounding really pathetic (cause I know I dont already) and depress myself further..not to mention anyone who might be reading. I am trying to remain positive and surround myself with more things that make me smile. Little thing that make my kids smile..which makes me smile too. I was at the grocery store and came across flowers on sale for 99 cents so I bought some..because its small things like a little vase of flowers that can make a day just a little bit brighter.
Ive found some new blogs that I love. Ive put them on the sidebar. Simple living, using what we have and being happy with it, and making our homes nice places to be are mainly what they are about. And of course some sarcastic one and crazy family ones too. Because I can relate to a lot of that too. Which leads me to the next topic of spending less time on the computer..but we'll save that for another day and another discussion about all my good intentions.

It's different when it's yours

2008-02-18T08:02:00.001-08:00

My little sister came to visit from out of state with her 5 month old baby. We had a great visit and aside from my kids, he's probably the cutest baby I've ever seen (I have to have some maternal loyalty!) When I first had BigBoy my sister lived with us and she was his nanny when I had to return to work. Granted she was 22 years old and just out of college then but it was rather entertaining to see how different her childcare habits have become.

I guess its not habits really just one main thing..germs! I don't remember her being such a germaphobe before. And if she was just some other mother out there I probably wouldn't even think her behaviour was very extreme. Maybe it's just because I know that she didn't worry about BigBoy getting exposed to things so I figured thats how she'd be with her kids too.

Of course being the big sister I feel its perfectly within my rights to tease her as much as I want about her worries. Pretty much anything beyond not letting my kids sneeze on him or making them wash their hands is up for comment. "What, you dont want too many strangers to hold him?" "No playgroups because there are too many kids with germs?" And in a total moment of deja vu I caught myself rolling my eyes when she said she didnt want to put her baby in the nursery at church...just like she use to when it was me not wanting BB to go in there. My my how times have changed lol.

My little family is on the opposite end of the spectrum. When one of gets sick we all get sick. Thats because we have no "cold etiquette" as my dr put it. I watched the other day as a glass of water made the rounds between all 4 family members within 2 minutes. As a family we believe in sharing everything I guess (unless its the chocolate that Im hiding behind the tea boxes.) So I know that as a family we could do a little better germ-sharing wise, I think as a society we've gotten a little carried away. Everything is anti-bacterial this or that and people are just plain paranoid at times.

A mom I know had questions about potty training her daughter. "What do you do when you have to use a public restroom?" Ummm, I use it?! "But do you let her sit on the seat? Do you hold her just above the seat so she's hovering? Do you bring a seat with you?" Once again Im probably a little too blase about germs. I will concede there are a lot of germs in a public toilet so I put those little paper things down or some toilet paper if there isnt any of those things. And then I wash my hands! No donning a bio hazard suit or hauling around my own portable toilet. Thats what God made skin for..to protect us. And when the skin gets dirty thats what soap is for. Pretty simple eh? And I wont start on the whole anti-bacterial thing. I hate the stuff and firmly believe that is why we are getting all these germs that are restistant to antibiotics etc. But thats a tangent I wont go off on right now..except to say Do you know how hard it is to find just regular non-antibacterial soap?

Of the people I know, more than not are germaphobes so it was so nice to read over at Mom 101 that in fact I am not alone. There are other like me out there who aren't too concerned it there kids go roll around in the sandbox and then let the dogs lick them clean. Others who think a quick swipe with a babywipe is good enough and that boiling water is for cooking purposes only.

Mr. Clean

2008-02-07T18:28:00.000-08:00

Hubby has decided that he needs to help doing the laundry

(Insert soft glowy light and angels trumpeting "Hallelujah, Hallelujah!")

I'd like to think this new found need to help is because he wants to lessen my burden...but in reality I think he's tired of not having clean underwear.

Either way, I dont really care. I am just happy for the help!! But one thing has become painfully clear. I obviously have been very remiss in my wifely duties of properly training my husband. We've been married for 8 years. If I hadnt been slacking the following lessons would have already been learned.

*Towels get washed with towels only (or jeans if theyre dark towels.)

*Do not wash towels with sweats...the result is not pretty

*The downey ball full of downey does not count as soap..you must still add laundry detergent

*Do not use your big muscles to cram as many clothes as possible into the machine

At this point Hubby was starting to get a little grumpy, overwhelmed and looked about ready to bolt from the laundry room. I quickly patted him on the back and said cheerily "Youre doing a great job honey!" Phew! I almost blew that one. If I had let him escape out of the laundry room you know that would have been the last time he set foot in there for another 8 years. Because I would have chased him away with too much information and too much of doing it my way.

Ive discovered that in order to get Hubby to help I need to let go a little more. I am by no means the Cleaning Guru but I have ways of doing things and thats how I like to do them. Going in and repositioning all the dishes in the dishwasher after Hubby has done it will just make him not want to do it. So what if I could fit a third more dishes in there than he did. At least there is one less load of dishes I had to do. So I'll let him have a go at the laundry. Worse case scenario? He ruins some clothes (hopefully mine!) and I'll need to go shopping to replace them. Hmm, maybe I shouldnt remind him about lights and darks...

Morning Discovery

2008-02-06T08:08:00.000-08:00

Big Brother was getting dressed the other day and took the opportunity to ..ahem..check things out. He comes into the kitchen, pulls down his underwear, and pulls "it" out.

"Mom, look at the bottom of my tentacles!"
(I promptly squirt coffee out my nose)
"Your what??"
"My tentacles"
(Trying unsuccessfully not to laugh and embarass him) "Ohhhhhh, you mean your testicles.
Thats what I said!"
"Ok, Ok what about them? "(They looked like normal 5 year old tentacles to me albeit a little uncomfortably stretched by his trying to look at the underside of them.)
"It looks like a brain"

(Ok that was the last thing I was expecting him to say.) Ummm, youre right, it does kind of look like a brain. Now go finish getting dressed! (A person can only handle so much coffee up the nose.)

"Yep, I think it is a brain" he states matter of factly as he walks out of the room.

If he only knew how true those words were.

No nakedness please

2008-02-05T11:17:00.000-08:00

We are done having babies. But occasionally we like to play the "what if" game and make ourselves laugh hysterically...or tease our children into thinking they might get another brother or sister. Which now that I think about it we had better stop. 'Cause Karma isnt funny sometimes.

Sweetgirl is very interested in pregnant women. She likes babies but is really fascinated by extremely pregnant bellies.

"Does she have a baby in her tummy?"
"Yes"
"Why?"
"Because the baby is growing "(thats as much info as a 3 year old needs I think.)
"Whats the baby's name?"

As this was a complete stranger in the grocery store I had to admit my ignorance on the subject.

Well that leads into the question:
"Sweetgirl, would you like mommy to have another baby?"
"No!" ( I was surprised because she loves babies.)
"Why not?"
"Because I dont want that baby naked in your tummy!!"

What the..????

Come to find out Sweetgirl is a little indignant about all these babies swimming around naked in their mommys' tummys. We had to go through each woman we knew who had had a baby lately and talk about whether the baby was naked or not in the tummy.

Auntie Lu?
Yes
Joe's Mommy?
Yes
Bellas Mommy?
Yes
Was I naked?
Yes, so was Big Brother. But then you were born and we put clothes on you.

This seemed to pacify her and get those poor babies off the hook. As I wasnt dont with my "what if" game I pushed the topic a little.

Sweetgirl, if we could just have a baby, and it wasnt naked in mommy's tummy, would you want one?
Oh yes!
What would we name it?
Baby! (duh, of course)

Then I break the news to her that we arent having any more babies. Then again, neither dh or I have had any kind of surgery to guarantee that. So maybe we should stop racking up the bad karma points.

It's always the Lexus

2008-02-04T22:43:00.000-08:00

To all you Lexus owners/drivers out there...I hate you! I swear if I get cut off by another freakin Lexus I am just going to lose it (more than I already have.) This post has been stewing in my mind for awhile now. For some reason when I drive I always think of good things I'd like to write about..which I seem to promptly forget once I get home. But it never fails while Im out, daydreaming, I mean driving and thinking, that the "Lexus post" is brought to the fore front of my mind. Why? Because yet again another bastard Lexus driver has pissed me off.

Hello! Do you see the 10 signs that say lane closed ahead? That means merge. Not race to where the lane ends, leaving all us poor peons that actually followed the directions in your dust, only to cute ME off to get in my lane. And I swear I dont have something against nice cars. Its not the Mercedes drivers, or the BMWs, or even that yellow Lotus that I keep seeing. Nope. I am not exaggerating when I say 9 out of 10 times when something occurs to get my road rage juices flowing its a stinkin Lexus. Have I mentioned yet that I hate all Lexus drivers? Oh I did? Ok sorry about the repetition. Honestly just thinking about it gets me all riled up.

Just to beat a dead horse heres an example from this evening. Im driving home..through construction (which is neverending in Las Vegas and has become just routine..but thats another post.) Im being blinded by someones lights as they are trying to drive up my cars rear. The road widens and the car jets past me..yup it was a Lexus. A few minutes later Im driving and the road narrows briefly from two lanes to one. As this happens a car zooms past me on the right (its only one lane!) and then cuts me off. Its another freakin Lexus. Im so glad that it endangered my life to get to the stoplight ahead of me. And then I notice it. Both Lexus's (whats the correct plural on that? Lexi?) are at the stoplight in front of me, turning the same way. What the hell? Are they travelling in packs now?

And just for the record, and to clear up any misunderstanding, I am not a slow driver. The officers that keep pulling me over to tell me to "slow it down" can attest to that.

I think I need to check out a Lexus dealership and find the brainwashing room that they pass all new owners through. Either that or there is some clause in the paperwork that they sign that says "If you buy a Lexus you must drive like an complete jerk at all times." And I think they must also hand out my license plate number and tell them to hunt me down.

Or Maybe...I should just buy a really BIG vehicle and claim I didnt see the poor little Lexus when I ran it over

Holiday Backfire

2008-01-16T16:09:00.000-08:00

I was reminded by someone (who I didnt know read my blog) that Ive been slacking on my posts. Which I knew I had but I did not realize my last entry was in October! So yeah, I would definitely call that slacking.

I don't usually post pictures of my kids on this blog but this picture was too good to pass up. A little back story first.

Big Boy has been to see Santa every year and never had any issues. The pics of the terrified screaming toddler? Not my child. While not maybe ecstatic to see Old St Nick, he had no problem climbing up on his lap and smiling dutifully for the camera. Until last year.

Last year we never even made it to see Santa. BB patently refused every time I even tried to bring up the subject. I was a little puzzled by his sudden vehemence that he would NOT go see Santa. Finally I asked him why.

"Because Santa knows Ive been naughty!"

Obviously Ive been using the "Santa is watching you" ploy and it has totally backfired in my face. No cute holiday pics with him, Sweetgirl, and Santa.

He tried the same thing this year but I was a great parent and told him "too bad, we're going to see Santa." Honestly, I thought he'd get over it once he was there. I reassured him that Santa knew that he had been good too and he didnt have to worry. The resulting picture was not what I was expecting. I will let it speak for itself.

I lie about Santa, Why not vegetables?

2007-10-30T08:11:00.000-07:00

The book "Deceptively Delicious" is all the talk in mommy circles these days. If you're unfamiliar with it, the basic concept is to puree the crap out of a ton of veggies and then sneak them into everyday foods. Like broccoli into the breading of chicken nuggets, spinach into brownies, cauliflower into cookies. I haven't really looked at the book yet because it sounds like a lot of work and I'm a bad mom. Plus..confession time..I really don't like vegetables. So spending hours cooking, pureeing, freezing pure vegetables doesn't really float my boat. Of course for all you good mommies out there, who actually care about the health of your kids, you might really like the book.

I did try some chicken nuggets that were brought to a playgroup. They weren't half bad. Except I could see little broccoli flecks, and I knew those sneaky little bastards were hiding in there! That's the main problem of the book for me...whose going to sneak the veggies in so I don't know about them??

You'd think a book about making healthy, tasty food for your children would be pretty controversy free. Oh no, not in Mommy Land. Some people have there Hanes all in a bunch because we are deceiving our children! Really! Come on people! I have enough Mommy Guilt without having to add guilt because I added something healthy to their menu.

In reality, we lie to our kids all the time, either by omission or commission. Maybe I'm just a big liar. My kids think there is a Santa, Easter Bunny, and Tooth Fairy. Poor things will probably be scarred for life. My lies of omission are that I don't tell them Daddy has a dangerous job and every day he leaves for work could be his last. I don't tell them that there is a pervert around every corner, and now, thanks to the evening news, I don't tell them I'm afraid to push someone elses kids at the playground for fear of being shot by an angry parent.

We are always keeping something from the kids (like the cookies hidden in the back of the cupboard just for me) and we mainly do it to keep them happy and healthy, mentally and physically. Are sneaking veggies in really that big of a deal? My kids aren't usually quizzing me on the exact ingredients of their meals.

"Did you use whole wheat flour in this or the more tasty white?"
"Did you add wheat germ and flax seeds to my muffins or just processed sugar?"
"Sorry mom, but you need to list any potentially healthy ingredients in this item before we can eat it."

I'm probably really going to burn in hell because I give my children vitamins disguised as Gummy Bears!

We're the bad neighbors

2007-10-22T23:08:00.000-07:00

I keep waiting for that knock on the door. I go to answer it and there will be a uniformed police officer.

Ma'am we've had several complaints from your neighbors. Do you have some kind of siren in your backyard? The neighbors are complaining of a loud siren sound emitting from your backyard at all times of day.

No Officer. I wish it was a machine. Then it would have an off switch. That sound is just my children.

(Officer looks at his notebook) Would these be the same children that the neighbors are complaining are always naked?

*Sigh* Yes, please just take me to bad parent jail now.

I so need a King sized bed

2007-10-17T23:08:00.000-07:00

Here is a sample of our bedtime prayers from the past couple of nights.

Sweetgirls Prayers:
Dear God thank you for today and the fun we had. Please help Sweetgirl have good dreams and to sleep all night long in her own bed.

BigBs prayers:
Dear God thank for the great day at school. Please help B to have sweet dreams and to sleep all night long in his own bed. Jesus's name is Amen (B's addition, guess I need to enunciate better when I say "In Jesus' name we pray, Amen.")

Momma's prayers:
Dear God pleeeeaaaaase let the kids sleep all night long in their own beds, please! Amen.

We've been playing some insane, middle of the night version of beach blanket Bingo lately. Sweetgirl sneaks into bed with us. I wake up a little later and carry her back to bed. I groggily climb back into bed only to find that in the short amount of time I was gone, BigB had snuck into our bed and is keeping my spot warm for me. Thoughtful fellow isnt he? Just like his father. Hubby woke up briefly to add these two awesome comments.

"Do you want your mom to carry you back to your bed?"

"Is this how it is every night for you?"

Yes, Hubby is lucky that I dont keep any sharp objects near the bed.

My Martha Moments

2007-10-15T20:52:00.000-07:00

I feel a kinship with Martha. I'm not exactly sure why because other than the fact that I enjoy many of the domestic disciplines, we have absolutely nothing in common. I am not organized, I am not tidy (and you know even Martha's garbage can is clean enough to eat out of,) and I've never been to jail...as an inmate at least.

I do, occasionally, get these crazy inspirations, that I need to be super crafty. Normally its just a small thing, like making something yummy to bring to a get together, or something else small scale-ish. Then there are the crazy times. Where something inside me says "If that Martha woman can do it, so can I." Like throwing a huge 4th of July party and making all the food myself....a week before my baby's due. Or, after not having sewn for 15 years, thinking I need to make my children intricate theatrical-worthy Halloween costumes. Or deciding to sand, primer, and refinish my son's bedroom furniture..in the middle of summer...outside..in Las Vegas. It's ok, you dont have to feel bad about calling me crazy, I do it myself all the time.

Call me Scarlett

2007-10-15T20:35:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling overwhelmed lately. Overwhelmed by all the things I need to do each day, the things I should do each day, the things I want to do each day, and by the fact that the list of things that actually gets moved over to the accomplished side is quite small...depressingly small. I feel like the Cat in the Hat, as he balances on the ball, all the while balancing a million and two things on top of each other. Except the Cat seems to be enjoying himself...and I just feel like a failure. Like all the threads that are holding everything together are about to start unraveling at any moment. Heck, who am I kidding, they started unraveling along time ago and there are only a couple stubborn knots holding everything together.

Thats when, thank God, my Scarlett O'Hara alter ego steps in and says..I'll just think about that tomorrow. Because really if I thought about it today it might just be too much. I think Scarlett was a smart girl, not to mention a snappy dresser. Yes, deep thought,self introspection, and being caught up on the laundry are important. And its really not a good idea to put off important matters for too long. But there are times where it, whatever "it" is, just needs to be put off until later. Because really, if I have to deal with it right now, I might just break into a million pieces. And who needs that? Because really, there's enough crap on my floor already.

I didnt have the heart to tell him the truth

2007-08-29T21:19:00.000-07:00

We just finished Day 3 of Bigboy being a Kindergartner. So far, so good. I was a little worried how he would do with the structure, having to stay in his seat, that whole thing. He's always just been with me so other than Sunday School its a whole new thing for him. But he's doing great. Unlike a boy in his class named Dylan who had as of Day 2 already been to the principals office (or as B likes to call it-the owner of the schools office) three times.

I had to talk to B's teacher today after school just to make sure things were going ok and address Hubby's and I main concern...that B was talking to much to his neighbors. Because according to him, he was. B is good at narking on himself. According to him he had gotten into trouble a few times for talking when he wasnt suppose to. Not that he can help it..its in his genes. Starting with my very first report card ever and continuing on till the end were the teachers comments "Talks to much to her neighbors." So I cant really get upset with him...because I totally understand. But all the worry was for naught. His teacher assured us that he was doing great and not talking anymore than anyone else. So thats good. Or maybe she's just afraid of pissing me off because Im one of the few moms that volunteered to help out in class. Hmm something to ponder.

Each day after school B assures me that he had fun and had a good day. We chitchat about what he did and I hear Dylans latest antics (he got in trouble today but didnt have to go to the Owners Office.) But each night at bedtime its a different story. As Im putting him to bed the same question pops up..

"Do I have school tomorrow?"

"Yes. Remember you'll go 5 days in a row."

"I dont want to go...I want to stay home with you... I miss you."

Aww my heart melts a little. Once again I consider the home schooling thing and just as quickly quiet the hysterical laughter in my head. So I tell him:

"I miss you too honey but you have to go to school. And you always have lots of fun."

"I wish I was still 4! I wish I was 4 forever and ever and ever. Then I could always stay home with you."

So now my 5 year old is wanting to be 4 so he can stay home. I also have the daily argument with my 2 year old that she is 2 not 5 and she cant go to school. Each day as we drop B off, Sweetgirl has to pipe in:

"Wheres my class?"

"Honey you dont have a class. You have to be 5 to go to school."

"I five?"

"No you are 2."

"I five!"

"No, 2."

"I two and a half."

She already has to get the last word in. Im in so much trouble.

Off into the wild world

2007-08-27T10:56:00.000-07:00

Today was B's first day of Kindergarten. My baby is now a big boy. I have been alternating excited and apprehensive about today. I am excited for all the wonderful moments ahead of him. And Im apprehensive of all the painful moments ahead. Because, truthfully, growing up is hard to do. My boy has such a big heart and feelings like his mommy..they get wounded easily.

There was an air of excitement throughout the house today. "School clothes" were brought out and Bigboy was finally able to take the tags off his brand new camo backpack. I made sure that he had a healthy, nutritious, filling, lovingly made breakfast. I found myself periodically throughout the morning brushing back tears and trying to swallow that lump that kept appearing in my throat. When I wasnt almost crying I was yelling at him to come-inside-out-of-the-mud-in-your-new-clothes! I didnt care what happened to those clothes once he was at school but I wanted him to at least walk in the classroom door not looking like Pigpen's twin brother.

Its 10 minutes before we are suppose to leave. Im running around in my underwear (my pants were being "ironed" in the dryer,) trying to get last minute things together. I had to take pictures of him before he headed off for his first day. But where? Its sprinkling outside (thus the mud) and there are few places I can take a picture inside without leaving photographic proof of our Messy Monday house. Ok we now have 5 minutes, Im still pantsless, and pictureless. I give up on the idea of some cute artsy picture, place him against a blank wall, and take several mugshot style pictures. He must have felt the mood too as he scowled obligingly. So no grinning first day of school pictures for us...but at least I can say I have one.

As Im fishing my pants out of the dryer, the heavens let loose with a boom of thunder loud enough to rattle my teeth. Big boy decides it looks like more rain and he has to go find an umbrella in the garage.

"Oh for Petes sake...we cannot be late for your very first ever first day of school! We live in Las Vegas..we do not need an umbrella" I think to myself.

We finally are all in the car, fully dressed, and off we go for our 4 minute drive to school. We have gotten less than 2 blocks when it begins to pour. I dont mean rain, I mean God was standing directly over our vehicle pouring buckets full of water on us. Then the thunder begins in earnest and of course, is accompanied by lightning.

Bigboy asks fearfully "Is the lightning going to hit us?"

"I dont think so, that last strike was about 2 houses away..I think we're ok."

I drive several more blocks and the emergency broadcast system comes on the radio ( I am not kidding!) warning of severe thunderstorms (oh really) and flash flood warnings. It was if nature was feeling my reluctance to part with my firstborn and trying to give me a reason to turn back home and give up on the whole thing. I can home school right? I'm smart enough. I have enough patience (insert maniacal laughter here.) So on I went, trying to see where I was going, all the while being impeded by the torrential downpour and the tears in my eyes.

B eventually made it to school. What was normally a 4 minute drive took us 20 minutes. He was a little late but so was everyone else so I call that on time in my book. I did not cry as I dropped him off at his classroom but that was through sheer will power alone. Once inside my car the tears came and keep on coming every time I think about it. My baby has started school. A whole new phase of his life. He's just going to keep getting bigger and older and I'm having a hard time wrapping my head and heart around that. How can he be in school?! Just yesterday he was a little wrinkled faced newborn taking a nap on my chest. I take a minute and a thousand snapshots of the last 5 years whisk through my mind.

I have a new snapshot to add to the collection. I went to pick up B from school. As I waited on the playground (where it is now hot and sunny and not an iota wet) for the teacher to excuse the kids I found myself filled with anticipation. I couldn't wait to hear how his first day went and see the experience through his eyes. I heard the teacher say "B your mom is here" and I looked up.

There came my son running out the door as fast as he could, a huge smile plastered across his face. "Mom" he shouted excitedly. It must not have only been my heart that painted the picture so sweet for I heard a couple awws from other waiting parents. That picture, of him running at me pell mell, with his little backpack on, and a smile that couldn't get any bigger, is amazing. So was the I-don't-know-if-it-will-ever-stop hug I got when he reached me. I guess this school thing isn't so bad after all.

Just like chicken

2007-08-14T08:26:00.000-07:00

Scene: Fast food drive through.

Big Boy what do you want to eat? Chicken or a burger?

Chicken, because thats what knights eat!

Oh really, knights eat chicken?

Yes! When they kill dragons they have to eat all of it.

(trying not to laugh) Hmm..and dragons are like chickens?

(very matter of factly) Yeah..except they are a lot bigger.

Holy Sweat Batman!

2007-08-11T16:06:00.000-07:00

Before I go any further let me reassure you...I'm ok and have no permanent injuries.

Yesterday I thought it would be a good idea to try out Bikram Yoga. Which if you dont know is a 90 minute Yoga class conducted in a room as hot and humid as the seventh level of Hell. I live in Las Vegas, I know what hot is. Ive lived in New York and Florida, I have experienced humidity. I have never experienced the hell that was that class. I should have known I was getting myself into something that would be uncomfortable for me. I cant sit in a sauna room for more than 10 minutes because I feel like I cant breathe. And yet I thought it would be fun to try and exercise for 90 minutes in such an environment. I have never, never, never sweated so much in my life...never!

So there I was, surrounded by people who have negative 2 percent body fat and are so flexible they must be at least first cousins to Gumby. About 45 minutes into the class I thought I was going to die. Ok not die but I was seriously afraid I was going to pass out. I gave into my sissy feelings and sat down on my mat for awhile. I had been warned ahead of time by my friend I was with, who's friend status is currently in review, that leaving the class was highly frowned upon and I might even endure some public comments/scorn if I did so. So I caved to peer pressure and sat on my mat, gasping for air and willing the blood pounding in my temples to calm down. There were several minutes where a panicked dialog was going on in my head.

Oh my God! I am going to pass out!

You cant pass out..all these people will stare at you!

Oh my God! I cant even sit in this room another minute. I am going to pass out!

People will look at you.

I have to get out of this room!

The teacher will make a snarky comment..in a new agey censure type way.

Shit shit shit...Im going to have to stay in this room.

I am proud to say that I stayed in the room. And once everything stopped spinning and my vision returned, I even joined back in and completed all the postures. I dont think its by accident that the last pose is named the corpse pose. By the end, I have to admit, I felt good. My legs were a little like jello as I walked back to my car, and the 105 temp outside felt balmy and cooling to my tomato red face. I was feeling a sense of accomplishment. I had been to hell and back and I was still standing. But they had obviously pumped some drugs into the room or the heat had turned my brain to mush..because I heard myself saying:

"Next time I go to class..."

Wish I could get a facelift so easy

2007-08-10T08:40:00.000-07:00

The few of you who read here will notice things look a little different. I had a mountain of laundry waiting to be folded (at least it was clean), toys scattered across every horizontal surface imaginable, and dishes in the sink. So I made the obvious choice...makeover my blog!

I was inspired my friend Lauren's redo and had been wanting to make some changes. Have to keep up with the Joneses, I mean Jarrells, after all.

So I wasted some time doing Google searches for just the right image. It took me longer than expected as I had to stop often to yell at the children. Why they think its a good idea to put blankets over their heads and run into each other...and walls... is beyond me. Then I had to spend a while more Photoshopping my new image to remove what Im sure is probably trademarked stuff and replace it with my own(googled) witticisms. I feel pretty confident that Ill be ok in the whole trademarked thing as only 3 people read my blog and I know my girls wont rat me out.

I love the lady in my new header image. On the outside she's all perfectly coiffed, has the pie you know is home made, and her sweet little family is sitting excitedly at the table. Exactly opposite of what my day to day life is like. And yet I feel a kinship with her. Why is that? Because I think we have the same maniacal look in our eye.

Dieting Ben & Jerry's style

2007-08-06T15:10:00.000-07:00

I am suppose to be on a diet. Its Monday. Every Monday is start-a-new-diet day. I actually remembered this morning.

Had a Slim Fast shake after my coffee instead of having no breakfast.

Had a healthy Lara bar for mid-morning snack..by the way these are probably the one thing that I really like that are actually good for me. Pretty much they are just fruits and nuts...and they taste awesome! And thats saying a lot coming from me because if its good for you I dont like it!

Had a turkey breast sandwich on whole wheat bread (with no cheese) for lunch.

Had a half of a pint of Ben & Jerrys Ice Cream after my daily (yes I said daily) afternoon nap.

And that, my friends, is how I diet.

Dont judge me by this post

2007-08-05T21:40:00.000-07:00

I have not been in the posting mood. And I suppose I still am not as Ive just typed and deleted about 4 intro sentences. And then I typed that last sentence and sat staring at the screen for about 5 minutes. Its not writers block per se. Its more like I have way too much to say and I cant make a decision as to what to write about. My internal editor is broken. So rather than let my poor blog sit here and be neglected, I will break the ice and get the writing started again. I'd say that something is better than nothing but I dont believe that is necessarily correct. Im feeling more along the lines of If you cant say something Interesting dont say anything at all.

Following paragraph has been deleted as it delved too far into a melodramatic pity party.

Im done for tonight. I will be back. With more. With ideas. But not with better punctuation.

Pushing my buttons

2007-06-13T22:11:00.000-07:00

My son knows how to push my buttons like no one else. I have a bad temper that I can usually control fairly well. Unless Im hormonal and then Hubby leaves presents of chocolate and ice cream in the fridge and hopes for the best.

But my lovely son. The apple of my eye. My snuggle partner. He can drive to seeing in red in just a matter of seconds when he feels like it. And then he pushes me farther. And then gives me another poke just for good measure.

The details of our last incident dont matter except that it was nap time and he was in his button pushing mood. After many warning to stop, and even a plea that Mommy was about to lose her temper and I was really trying to control it so please stop, I lost it. And then I was the bad Mommy. I told my little boy too "shut up." I felt terrible. He just looked at me unphased and continued the sass and nasty glares. Well I guess I can be thankful that I obviously didnt scar him too deeply with my mean words. While Im in confession mode I might as well add that I think I threw a damn in there somewhere at some point in the whole incident. He stopped in mid-whatever he was doing and looked at me.

"Thats a bad word, You arent suppose to say that!" (The voice he was using..I swear he was channeling my mother somehow.)

Usually I will agree and apologize because I really dont want him to start coping me. Not today...I was acting not quite my age.

"I dont care if its a bad word. Just go to bed!"

I get him settled down after threats of being grounded forever and the agreement that I would lay down a little with him. As we are both laying there, both tense and upset from our fight, he turns his head and looks at me. And I hear my words come out of his mouth:

"Are you thinking about what you did?"

Bug Drama

2007-05-21T21:23:00.000-07:00

My son has a vendetta against bugs. Im not sure when this hatred began but its been his mission for awhile now to kill all ants he sees. Actually I think it began when the apt we lived in after we first moved to Las Vegas became infested. Maybe he heard me muttering "Ill get you, you little bastards" one too many times. Or maybe because I scared the bejeebus out of him warning him to stay away from the fire ants swarming outside this same said lovely apartment.

Ive tried to tell him that the little black ants in the backyard are ok. They are outside where God intended them to be so he doesnt need to squish them. I laughed at his response and went back inside.

Recently I went outside and again he was poking at a bug. This time it was a nasty roach that was already on its last leg thanks to the Orkin Man . I dont want to worry that later on my little guy is pulling the wings off flies and giving our cat odd glances so I decided I should nip this bugacide before it gets out of hand.

"You shouldnt kill all the bugs. It isnt nice."

And again the response that I laughed off so easily the first time:

"Its ok mom...Im helping them. Im sending them to Heaven."

Wonderful! My son had progressed directly to an Angel of Death. Maybe we should rethink having my grandmother come visit.

I had to explain to my oh so helpful son, that while our pets may be in Heaven, bugs wont. They just die. He looked a little disappointed that all his helpfulness was for naught and then quickly recovered.

"Ill just kill them then." (so much for kind compassion)
I had been defeated by a 4 year old.

"OK just kill them quick. Dont tease them." Because of course dying is better than being teased. Oh great now thanks to my words of wisdom Im teaching him to be a school shooter.

A few minutes later I see him washing some rocks off.

"I squished it (the roach) with the rocks. But Im cleaning up now."

And now my lessons in cleaning up after himself has led him to erase all traces of his crime. I think my parenting license should be revoked.

But maybe Im being too hard on myself. Its his father, after all, who hates bugs. The closest Hubby will get to any bug or arachnid is as close as an aerosol can full of bug death requires. Yes, we'll blame it on Hubby. Because it could never be my parenting skills that are in question. After all, Im the one who told him it would be a good idea to do this:

Our favorite place

2007-05-05T08:22:00.000-07:00

It was Amnesty Week and I didnt even know it...at our local library. How excited was I not to have to pay any fines when I returned the huge stack of books that had been floating around our house...for months. Yes Im one of those people who keep books way past their due date. I didnt realize it was such a big deal until I read the angry comments when someone else posted about their similar bad habits. Although I dont think there are a long line of people waiting for No More Diapers for Ducky! Which somehow did not make it into the stack of books to get returned. I think Sweetgirl hid it so she could feed her Ducky fix a little longer.

I love the library. Not just being able to get books for free but I love the whole library experience. And Im in absolute heaven when I can go to the library kid free. Hubby will call me on these rare occasions.

Where are you?

Im at the library (duh!)

Still?! You've been gone for an hour and a HALF.

I know...I told you I was going to the library.

He should know by now that if I go to the library by myself he should expect me to be gone for several hours. I could spend all day really....now theres the idea of a perfect day if I ever heard one.

My whole family loves to read. Which means me, my mom, and my sister. When I was younger we lived in the boondocks but we'd take monthly trips to the city library. Since we wouldnt be back for at least a month and I was a fast reader even then, we really stocked up on books. I would leave the library with my stack of books balanced in my arms, mentally envisioning which book I would read first. I wouldn't even be able to wait until I got home. I'd be a quarter way through my first book by time we got there. My mom used this love of books wisely to her advantage. Some kids were grounded from tv or the phone. Me..I was grounded from reading. Oh the horror! I can remember getting in trouble in Fourth grade for reading in class because I was grounded at home.

I dont think loving to read and loving the library necessarily go hand in hand. There are people who enjoy reading who probably dont get the same thrill I do when they step into the public library. Maybe part of my love of the library is pure economics. I am a speed reader. My mom took a speed reading class once..and I can read faster than her. While in some ways its great (the faster you can read the more books you can enjoy,) in other ways it can be a real pain (keeping unread books on hand.) It would cost me a small fortune (or maybe a large one) if I had to buy all the books I read. But I can get them for free at the library...if I dont count the fines I have to pay when I return them.

Aside from economics I love the whole library experience. Wandering the aisles just kind of window shopping. The smell of old musty books (thats the best!) Picking out an aisle in the non fiction area and just browse the whole row. Who knew there could be so many books on furniture repair or 16th century Ireland. I dont usually follow the adage "Dont judge a book by its cover." If Im roaming the fiction aisles the covers definitely come into play, especially when time is limited. If the cover features a vampire princess riding a Pegasus Im pretty sure I dont want to read it.

Im happy to say that Im passing my love of reading onto my children. They both love going to the library to pick out books and tend to get angry when they've found out Ive sneaked there without them. But Im quickly forgiven when I whip out a new Dr Seuss book (we love the rhyming) or anything cowboy, pirate, or animal themed. Although Hubby did want an explanation about the rash of girl power books I got for my son last time. In my defense, I knew that The Princess Knight (which he loved!) was about a girl but I really did think the book with the long red haired pirate on the front was about a man pirate. Guess thats what we get for judging by the cover.

Your Children

2007-05-01T20:38:00.000-07:00

There are days where I love being a mom. Where my children are wonderful and I feel that I must be at least a little responsible. Today was not one of those days. Today my children were "Your" children...as in I called Hubby and said "Your children are driving me crazy." I claim no parental responsibility in how they behaved today. In fact I think that I should get a parenting award for the fact that my children are still alive at the end of today. I have seen meth freaks going through withdrawls that were more pleasant than my little angels today.

I lay in bed with my son tonight (sweating to death because he said he didnt want the fan on...just to be contrary) I mentioned that today had been a hard day. He looked at me oddly and I added "because you kept getting angry and in trouble."

"Thats because I was grumpy today," he matter of factly stated.

Oh really? I hadnt noticed that when you were stomping up in down in the grocery store crying as loud as a professional mourner...because I wouldnt buy a freaking watermelon! I knew at that moment that it was going to be a verrrry long day. Now add to that lovely public scene my sweetgirl starting to cry loudly as well. Why? Because her brother was, so it must be a good idea. Id like to say things got better as the day progressed...Id be lying.

Good riddance

2007-04-27T08:19:00.000-07:00

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something
-Plato

Obviously I am having a slow brain day as I felt the need to comment on the fact that Rosie O'Donnell has left the View. Slightly hypocritical since I was just asking Hubby last night wasnt there more important things for the news to cover than Rosie's Big departure?

I remember, way back in the day, when Rosie O'Donnell first started her own talk show. I was a stay at home nanny at the time and it happened to air during one of the twins feeding times. So I held 2 babies with 2 bottles and watched. And had a laugh or two. The old Rosie was a lot kinder, funnier, and much less strident. Watching her didnt instantly make my hackles rise and get me wildly looking for the remote.

Rosie has changed. And of course, in the past 10+ years, I have changed to. Matured (why does that word make me wince? Maturing is a good thing, no?) Maybe thats what makes me dislike this newer version of RO. It doesnt seem as if she has matured (not that she was high on the maturity scale to begin with) but instead she has digressed. Back to the schoolyard where her childish bullying seems more at home.

Maybe I don't like her because I have never liked to be mocked or made fun of. Too many unpleasant childhood memories. In lieu of anything intelligent or remotely positive to say, RO has gone the route of mockery and just plain being LOUD. Yes she has always been loud. I like loud. I have loud children, friends, family, and have loud tendencies myself. I do not like when people are loud just so they can drown out anyone else that is trying to talk or be heard. I have no tolerance for Acoustic Bullying.

In the interest of disclosure, I also do not like her because I disagree with about 98% of the things that come out of her mouth. No, thats not really true. Not the disagree part; thats totally true. But that is not why I dislike her. There are comedians (yes I purposely left the word others out) that are totally liberal...and totally funny! I have close friends and family that are politically or religiously polar opposites of myself. And I love being around them. Great, now I sound like the person who when accused of being racist says "Im not racist I have a (insert race of choice) friend!" Super! Hmm, actually I think most of my friends are in that other political party.

I do not generally get in political debates. Or religious debates. Or debates about really anything for that matter. Because I am not a good debater. Oh I can come up with good things to say, and even some snappy comebacks here and there. But I have this problem where I start to get agitated quickly...and my voice starts getting louder. And we are just suppose to be having a civilized discussion. I blame it on the Italian in me. So I normally remain silent when the hot topics come up. Which is totally fine because really...am I going to change anyones point of view on these hot button topics. Almost everybody has a very definitive place where they stand on issues and I could talk till Im blue in the face and not move them an inch. So why waste my time and theirs? I know some people enjoy a good debate on a topic regardless of the outcome. I am not one of them.

Back to dear Rosie for a moment...and other liberals. No Im not going to liberal bash..well maybe just a little. Not about certain beliefs, concerns, or what issues they find important. Just about one little thing that irks me. I will also admit that this might not only be a liberal trait. Maybe I only notice it in them? Liberal. It brings to mind what? To some maybe more liberal thinking, acceptance of things, and open mindedness. That's the one that irritates me to no end. Open mindedness...but only as long as you think along the same lines. Because if you were really tolerant and open minded whats wrong with being conservative? When you bash or mock someone that believes differently (or more conservatively) isnt that actually being close minded? I think so.

In the end I wish Rosie luck. I hope she finds more happiness, less bitterness. I hope she finds her way back to her funnier, kinder self. And if not, I really hope she finds her next job off television so my channel surfing is safe again. Because in case you forgot..its all about me, right?

Pick some up on your next grocery run

2007-04-11T20:51:00.000-07:00

I use to go to department stores for my beauty products. Now I got to the grocery store, with 2 impatient children, and try to pick something out before the eggs get broken or one of my kids tries to escape from the cart. Gone are the days of lingering over Chanel and feeding my Lancome addiction. Unless its my birthday and I have a gift certificate to Sephora (I get giddy just thinking about it!)

I kept seeing the commercial for this collagen filler stuff and thought it looked pretty good. Las Vegas has lots of plastic surgery but unless I hit it big at the penny slots I can pretty much kiss that route goodbye. But hey, if I can pick up a quick fixer upper at the grocery store wouldnt that be convenient.

Yes Id like a gallon of milk and an order of 5 years younger please.

But then again how good can something be that you pick up at the grocery store? Well it turns out pretty darn good. Ok maybe I dont look 5 years younger but it gives me at least a good 6 months of age reversal.

I had been blessed with always looking younger than I really was. Ok at 16 its not a blessing to look 12 but to be mistaken for a fellow highschooler when your 25 isnt so bad. But Im not 25 anymore. And I probably wouldnt want to be 25 again. But I sure as hell wouldnt mind looking 25. I am realistic however and was not looking for some miracle cure. I have some small wrinkles around my eyes (who was the bastard that came up with the term crows feet?) And those small lines havent bothered me because they are mainly from crinkling my eyes when I smile. And you really cant get too mad at wrinkles that you got from being happy. But I now have a bitch of a grand canyon wrinkle right between my eyebrows. And that one is not from smiling..and I hate it.

My fibromyalgia has given me lots of things. Habitual exhaustion, sleep issues, migraines, arthiritc pain wah wah wah. And Ive tried to take it in stride and with a sense of humor most days. But I draw the line at mother f-ing wrinkles! Hubby says he can tell when Im hurting (or irritated) because I get "crinkly forehead." Other than being a flashing neon sign announcing my feeling the furrowed brow has given me...a furrow. Nice huh? Just the word you wanted associated with your face. Furrow.

I will accept the smile wrinkles. I will try to accept almost daily aches and pains. I will NOT accept wrinkles from being in pain. A girl just has to draw the line somewhere. So until I can save my pennies to buy that botulistic plastic biospheric whatever injection and make that fucker disappear Ill make do with grocery store offerings. Which leads me way back to the actual topic at hand.

For me, this stuff actually works pretty good! It comes out something akin to spackle. You just kind of fill the wrinkle with the cream and then pat it in. Repeat 1-2 times daily. As I am a total slacker, Im doing good if I do it daily. But I totally noticed a difference after a few days. No, tragically, not on the furrow, but the wrinkles around my eyes all but disappeared. In fact I now have to crinkle my eyes to see where exactly the lines are so I can apply more of my miracle cream. I did notice that if I dont use the cream for several days (or a week-slacker remember) that the wrinkles tend to show up more. But heck if all it takes to make my wrinkles disappear is to apply a little spackle each day..count me in.

I was at Costco yesterday, and while I dont need a 5 gallon bucket of mayonnaise, I did notice that they sell this product in a 2 pack for about the same price as a single tube at regular Albertson prices. With savings like that I can almost afford to feed my Benefit addiction.

I am a crazy mom

2007-04-02T20:26:00.000-07:00

Today was not one of my more brilliant days. There are days when I honestly feel that it would be better for all in involved if I was committed, preferably to somewhere that would give me lots of drugs. Today was a banner one of those days.

I was feeling especially exhausted today. My fibromyalgia was rearing its nasty head and all my energy went down the shower drain it seemed (hey at least I showered.) I tried to put the kids down for a nap; they refused. By refused, I mean that I put them in their rooms and I could hear them either screaming or doing some sort of major remodeling project. I caved and let them out of their cages, I mean rooms.

So Im laying on the couch, yelling at my son for the zillionth time to not bark in the house (really!) when I get my brilliant idea.

"Lets go shopping and get you guys some new shoes."

This is where the men in white coats should have arrived with sirens screaming, broken down my door, and hauled me away. We would all have been better off.

Why in the hell would I think it was a good idea to take my children shopping (take them anywhere) on a day when brushing my teeth made my arm tired? I have no sane explanation. I guess I thought that screaming at my children in public would be much more fun than screaming at them in my living room.

So I take my children to the outdoor outlet mall. By myself, with no naps, with no stroller. Yes my wise decisions, they kept on a comin'. Within 10 minutes of being there I was already hissing at my children under my breath as they ran all over the shoe store. Sweetgirl felt the need to try and open every shoe box. She loved the sale rack because they were already open so she could just take out whatever shoe she wanted and try it on. It was a tie between a pair of heeled womens clogs and a blue fuzzy slipper. Big brother viewed the aisles as his own personal sprint lanes..enough said.

I threatened to take them home if they didnt sit down. They sat down for 4 seconds and then started wrestling and playing king of the mountain. Other mothers walked by, with their quiet (strapped down) children and gave me looks. And they werent looks of empathy. No solidarity of mommas here. They were more looks of "what the hell is wrong with your children and where is your stroller?"

We left the shoe store, mission accomplished. Although I probably will not be able to look at my childrens feet all summer without breaking into a sweat and having flashbacks. And then I decided while Im here I might as well get Big Brothers Easter outfit. No sense having to make another trip. In for a penny, in for a pound. Three, yes three, stores later I find myself chasing both of my wild animals, I mean sweet children, around Osh Kosh B'Gosh while trying to catch a glimpse out of the corner of my eye for anything that could pass for Easter gear. After about 10 minutes the sales girl comes up to me and asks if Im finding everything ok.

"Im not really looking at anything. Im just chasing my children around your store and yelling at them." That actually came out of my mouth. At least she had the courtesy to laugh with me. Although in retrospect I think she was laughing at me.

I am a pretty laid back mom; however, as a general rule, I do not let my children run around like crazy monkeys in public. By the end of our shopping excursion today I was letting the store security guard babysit them while I madly grabbed things off the rack. I think Big Brother is going to look like Little Lord Fauntelroy meets Eminem but at least he'll have nice shoes.

John Wayne as he's never been seen before

2007-03-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

"Hey Momma! Do I look like John Wayne?"

I look up to see what my 4 year old is talking about. He has on his cowboy hat, leather belt with holster and gun, and nothing else.

"Well not exactly. John Wayne was never naked...he wore clothes."
"Oh yeah," my son giggles, "I forgot."

"Forgetting" clothes is one of my sons favorite pastimes. I can get him completely dressed and 5 minutes later he is somehow completely naked again. "I just want to be naked for a little while," is his common response. But he does not want to be completely naked. He has to add his cowboy hat, or fireman helmet, or his knight breastplate and shield. He is like some male stripper gone horribly awry. While I love that he has a great imagination and loves to dress up as his favorite occupations I do wish he had a little more clothes on before he dons his military backpack, camo helmet, and squirt gun(its an army-man gun Mom!) Wouldn't it be a little more comfortable to roll around on the grass or ride his bike with some clothes on?

I'm not a big strut around naked kind of person so it kind of amuses me that my children act like escapees from the nearest nudist camp. Although if I had cute 4 year old buns I might think of clothing as an option too. But at least this newest incident has given me a new weapon in the war against constant nudity. "Those are great pants honey..they look like something John Wayne would wear!"

And it works!

Blog Envy

2007-03-13T14:40:00.000-07:00

I was about 2/3 the way through an entry and went to add a picture and the whole freakin thing disappeared! Grrr. So that topic will have to wait because I dont feel like writing about it again right now. Just remind me to write about Sephora and the grocery store later...I love how I always write like there is someone actually reading this blog. Anyhoo onward and upward.

Im fairly new to this whole blog culture. Ive kept a mainly picture blog of the kids for far away family and friends but thats about it. I might type a quick caption or explanation but nothing too crazy. And while I have not been writing I have also not been reading many either. A couple of good friends have blogs and I would always check to see if they had written anything recently but thats where it ended. Its just recently that I have been sucked into the vortex of blog addiction. It all started with someone giving me a link to a very funny post( click here.)

Suburban Turmoil quickly became my favorite new blog to hang out at. Maybe I can check a little too obsessively on the days she takes awhile to post but cut me a little slack. Remember Im the one who gets her thrills by cheating against her 4 year old. It started off innocently enough. I added Suburban Turmoil to my favorites so I could check it each day for a little chuckle. And then I started looking around noticing there were links to other blogs.

One of the first I linked to(Go Leanne!) had me with tears streaming down my face. Its honesty and poignancy ripped into me and claimed a piece of my heart. While some blogs make me chuckle this one makes me ache for someone I have never met and reminds me to be thankful everyday for what I have.

I had to go back to ST to see what else I could see. And thus the downward spiral began. I'd link to one blog which had a link to another blog which had a link to another blog. Its amazing how much time you can piss away when you're thouroughly enjoying yourself and avoiding the laundry at the same time.

Besides being a major time sucker (something my children werent enjoying) there is also another down side. Ive become intimidated. There are so many wonderful blogs out there that who am I to try and add to it? My poor baby blog was already starting to be neglected. But then I realized..or perhaps rerealized (is that a word) that I am not writing this for anyone else but myself. I started it as a place that I could spill the dam of words that built up in me throughout the day. Be it from having no one to talk to, or biting my tongue, or from my newish tendency of being rather introverted (which is so not who I was ever before.) I can impress myself with my maudlin thoughts, my witty-to-me anecdotes, or my serious issue with proper punctuation. And it will also help those poor mommies at playgroup from being drowned by the words that have become pent up inside me.

All negative comments aside, I love mommy/women bloggers. I love the ones from working moms, stay at home moms, women with crazy mothers, women who are crazy mothers. There are times when Im reading where Im literally laughing out loud, blushing, or glad the kids are asleep so they dont ask mommy why shes crying. I love the ability these women (and one or two men) have with words to make my cry, laugh, squirm, and yes, roll my eyes. I love that they can be frankly insane, or bitingly witty, or amazingly laid bare for all to see.

So to all those women I say thank you. Although now Ive had to institute a no blog reading unless the children are sleeping rule. Hmmm now begins the newest struggle...going to bed when I should or reading just one more blog.

Come here my little snugglebugs

2007-03-06T08:30:00.000-08:00

I was blessed with a first child that was a "good sleeper." He quickly slept through the night and once he got over the "wanting to be held while he slept" thing, he was also took great naps. He took 2 naps forever and now at 4 1/2 still takes about a 2 hour nap almost everyday. I read books about establishing good night time routines and putting the child to sleep when he was sleepy but not asleep. And I did this...until I got pregnant. And then I was so tired. I'd put him to bed and then decide to snuggle with him for just a minute. Of course having pregnancy induced narcolepsy I fell instantly asleep. And thus a new routine was born.

A few minutes has turned into a few years. I have to lay with my son every night now. Just me. Daddy can read him a story but its Mommy that must lay with him. For awhile I tried to wean him of the habit. Making it an every other night thing or making it only 2 instead of the usual 10+ minutes. My son, of course, resisted my efforts. He would become hysterical and panicked as if I had told him that he could never have candy again. If I refused to lay with him he would be inconsolable. The boy knows how to lay down a guilt trip. So my soft mothers heart gave in. While in my mind I knew most of it was for show,because it could be turned off the instant I laid down, my heart felt pain at his distress. So I caved. Mother, thy name is marshmallow. I gave into my sons wish to snuggle and be comforted at bedtime. I gave into my secret guilty pleasure of snuggling with my baby a little longer.

I say guilty pleasure because there is always that outward pressure to raise an "independent" child. That at certain ages properly raised children should do certain things.The time will come soon enough (too soon!) that my son will not want to cuddle with his mommy. He will not lay next to me and say "Come here my little snugglebugs," as he wraps his arms with their scraped elbows around my neck and squeezes a little too hard. So I relish this stolen time. I lay next to him and breathe deeply the scent of his hair, which even after a bath somehow manages to smell like a puppy. We lay in the dark and tell stories of knights, firefighters, and policemen catching the bad guys. We say our prayers and "God bless" everyone we know, including their pets. And then he wraps his arms around me, or asks if we can "make spoons," and he slowly fall asleep. And while there are a million other things that I need to be doing, lists and lists of stuff that are calling my name, there is nothing that is more important, or that Id rather be doing, than putting my son to bed, the snugglebugs way.

A too often visitor

2007-03-01T21:05:00.000-08:00

A clear sign that I need to change my ways.

The doorbell rings unexpectedly. My 2 year old baby girl starts jumping up and down and clapping her hands.

"Pizza Guy, Pizza Guy!"

Naw-ee Dog!

2007-02-27T16:14:00.000-08:00

Our dogs name is Annie, as in Annie Oakley, the great cowgirl. We also tend to call her Annie-girl or Annie-dog with our sweetgirl calling her Nannie. But she is a puppy and her puppy behaviour has earned her a new name:

Naw-ee Dog!

I guess I call her naughty dog more than I realize. Sweetgirl calls her naw-ee dog as much as she calls her Nannie. But she is such a naughty dog! I knew labs chew but give me a break! Could she at least once chew the toys I've bought instead of: any shoe she get her razor sharp teeth close to, the kids toys, the carpet, the molding for crying out loud, the safety gate at the top of the stairs, the slats under our bed, books, the tree outside, my sons bike, and sadly the list goes on. I also knew that labs love to eat and had been warned not to overfeed her. I wasn't told that she'd be sneakier than any jewel thief in order to steal everyone elses food. She seems to prefer the kids pb&j over that outrageously expensive dog food I buy her. She'll also steal the kids apples if they dare put one down for a second. She does not want to eat it, merely carry it outside and roll it in the dirt so I have to spend hundreds of dollars a month on fruit to make up for the lack of vegetables in their diet. And now that she's getting bigger I saw her attempt to get something off the counter! Naughty dog better be careful or she's going to find herself banished to the backyard..or hubbys favorite threat "send her back to Idaho." Which Im sure my pregnant sister (who already has 3 dogs) would absolutely love.

I want 3 days

2007-02-26T15:34:00.000-08:00

I am exhausted. Period, end of sentence, long pause. T-i-r-e-d! Hubby had to work all last weekend due to extenuating circumstances. Do I feel bad for him because HE had to work with no weekend? Of course not. I feel sorry for me. Because it is always about me, as it should be. The kids have worn me out and I need a recharge bad. So hubby had to work so no days off for me and then this weekend he was gone ice fishing with the buddies. I dont begrudge him the trip but I guess Im a little jealous..oh and did I mention tired?! Not jealous about ice fishing. Only men would think that sitting around a hole and freezing your ass off is fun. No Im jealous that he got 3 days away! 3 days to do whatever. 3 days to be with his friends, drink, and loaf around. That, my friend, makes me pea green with envy.

Which reminds me in an offhand way. Do you know how many times hubby has taken both kids with him out of the house all by himself since our 2 year old was born? Two! Two friggin times in two years. I harp on him how pathetic that is and he just laughs. Makes me want to stab him with a fork. His response is "Ill watch the kids and you can go do something." What I want to do is lay on my couch in complete silence for a little while. I want to eat something all by myself and not share a bite. Id even settle for doing a little cleaning without having to backtrack 2 seconds later to tidy it up again. What I want is for him to run errands with both kids so he'll think twice next time he asks me to do something while he's at work.

Did I mention that Im tired. Part of it is being with the kids nonstop all by myself for a couple of weeks. But that in turn has really made my fibromyalgia kick in..and its kicking my butt. I feel like I just ran a marathon while I had the flu. Always a fun time. But hubbys getting home in the next hour. Im ordering pizza for everyone and then hiding in my room, in my bed, for the rest of the night! Maybe Ill bring up a bottle of wine to my hideout. Now that sounds like a good time.

Random Wanderings

2007-02-25T21:20:00.000-08:00

Why is it that throughout the day Ill come up with topics to blog and then when the time comes to write I have nothing? Not exactly writers block...more like I have a million little things I want to say that have nothing to do with each other. Little things I think of through the day and have no one to tell. Or sometimes I just want to talk about myself and I already know how great (or messed up I am.) My children are too young and really you can only talk to yourself so much before people starting thinking about committing you...or at least medicating you. So this is my random post. And knowing me, Im sure it will be one of many.

-I hate punctuation. I dont remember the rules so I make up my own. Commas are ok but...is better. I have no use for ; nor do I even know truly how to use one. And Im very hit and miss with ' why waste the keystroke when if it isnt really necessary.

-I am a spelling snob. I have always been a good speller and cant understand why everyone else isnt. I tend to think that people who cant spell arent very smart. I know, I know that is not true (my mom and sister are bad spellers and VERY smart.) It is my secret discrimination. And I am mortified when I misspell.

-I love ebay. It is my crack and thanks to ebay my daughter has way too many clothes. Just dont tell my husband. I almost have him convinced that I sell more on there than I buy.

-I hate vegetables and thus am a horrible mother and am lax on feeding them to my kids (green beans and broccoli are ok.)

-I would rather read a book than watch tv. I would rather read a book than do almost anything else. I have to limit how much I read or I will neglect everything else. When I was younger my mom would ground me from reading as punishment. If ebay is my crack reading is my heroin.

-I have a bad temper. Nasty. Few people know this. Unfortunately the only people who really know are those I love the most.

-I have discovered craigslist. While it is not ebay it does make my check-every-day-list. I just got a great antique end table for $15! The hard part is not buying things just because they are a good bargain.

-When I daydream it is always about what I would do in various tragic events. Usually someone has died in my daydreams. Im one messed up cookie arent I? My children do not factor in my disaster daydreams. To think of anything happening to them is unfathomable and my mind cannot go there.

I could go on and on but I wont. My mind wanders so and will skip from topic to topic for hours. I am not nearly as interesting or witty as I wish but when you go days without speaking to another adult other than the grocery clerk the words have to spew somewhere. So this is where I spew. And the poor people who've wandered onto this blog are feeling so lucky.

The New & Improved Version

2007-02-23T22:14:00.000-08:00

My daughter looks just like me. Well just like I did at 2 anyway. My husband was trying to claim some resemblance ("She has my nose") until I whipped out a picture taken of me at around the same age. He then had to concede that she was all me. Which I think is only fair since my son was born looking exactly like my husband. In fact the first thought that flitted through my head at that first glimpse when the doctor held him up was "Wow he looks exactly like his father!" Its kind of funny if you think about it too much..saying babies and young children look just like their parents. How does a gorgeous toddler look just like her graying, overweight mom? I mean I have my moments but honestly some days the closest I get to looking good is making sure my shirt is clean.

I had the opportunity this summer to visit some family friends that have known me since I was just a baby. Actually my ex-step-mom (a moniker that in this day and age makes perfect sense.) "Oh she reminds me of someone I use to know" she sighed. And then it kind of hit me. I get to relive my childhood in my daughter- but in a good way. I did not always have it the best growing up but in my way of thinking it could have been a lot worse. But through my little girl, who has this amazing, funny, spunky, loving personality, I can see what might have been. I can give her a stability that was lacking quite often for me. I can give her gentleness. I can try to raise her with a clear and positive sense of self without all the baggage. And in loving so dearly this little copy of me maybe I can rediscover some of who I am and love that person a little more as well.

Ratted Out

2007-02-19T20:35:00.000-08:00

My son has a knack for embarassing me. While his behavior in public can at times make me wish that I could melt into the ground like the Wicked Witch thats not really what Im referring to. No, my four (excuse me four and a half) year old has that special talent to know exactly when would be the worst time to say something..and then do so loudly.

Foremost in my mind is a not far enough in the distant incident at playgroup. Everyone knows that you're not suppose to come to playgroup with sick kids. But in this winter of a seemingly endless rotation of coughs and runny noses I was desperate. I hadn't been out of the house in days and I knew I had to do something when I was trying to engage the convenience store clerk in some meaningful dialogue. Drastic times call for drastic measures.

The morning we were scheduled to go to playgroup at a local music class my son wakes up with a startling change to his voice. Either puberty had hit early or he was getting sick again! But not sick enough to lay on the couch quietly and watch tv...just sick enough to drive me completely crazy. So I did the unthinkable..I took my kids to playgroup anyways.

As we're getting ready to go hubby has to pipe in:
"are you sure you should take him to playgroup? He's sick."
"He's fine..aren't you honey? He's just a little hoarse."

I quickly get my son to agree that he's not sick and he really wants to go to playgroup. So out the door we go. As we're getting out of the car I quickly remind him that if he feels the need to cough to NOT cough on anyone and that he's not sick he's just a little hoarse.

We get to music class and the teacher is late so the kids have some free play time. Everytime my son runs by (because it seems it is physically impossible for him to walk anywhere) I grab him to urgently whisper in his ear "dont cough or breathe on anyone!"

The teacher walks in and has everyone sit quietly in a circle. She addresses the class and then calls on my son who has his hand up for some reason.
"Did you want to say something?"
"I have a horse voice!" he croaks out.
Of course he does...and of course he had to tell everyone as loud as he could. I try to laugh it off as all the other moms give me the evil eye. Im so busted.

Girls have vaginas

2007-02-18T19:49:00.000-08:00

My just newly turned 2 year old daughter is very proud of her vocabulary..and her body as well it seems. Each day she likes to go around the house point to objects and tell me their names: naughty dog, kitty, VV (tv). She also has a new habit of giving a running commentary of what she and everyone else is doing."Me eat," "Mommy drink foffee," "Dadda go work"....you get the picture.

She also knows all her body parts and is quite fond of the game of pointing them all out and saying the proper name. And I do mean all of them. Much to hubbys chagrin our sweet baby girl likes to point out that she has a vagina...or nana as she has taken to calling it.
"my nana" she'll randomly point out.
"Yes sweetgirl thats your vagina."
"Mommys nana"
"Yes sweetie mommy has one to"
brother"has penisss"
"yes he does"
"Dadda has penisss"
"Yes he does, now do you want cereal or eggs for breakfast?"

And so it goes throughout the day. I feel like the second half of a comedy act. She cant just point out that she has a vagina...we have to go throught the entire spiel. And if hubby is around he gives me a pained look and when she's not looking will whisper "please make her stop." Its all well and good when your son first discovers and can put into words (because they discover it right away dont they?) that he has a penis. That a boy! And its no big deal to constantly have to tell your boy to get his hand out of his pants..nothings going to disappear. But none of these are ok when its our sweet baby girl.

I saw the writing on the wall when hubby and I were discussing what we would use as names for private parts. We opted for clinical over cutsie. Its a penis not a pee pee...although there were days when my son was real small that pee pee yelled at the top of his lungs in public probably would have been less embarassing than PENIS! Then we got to talking about girl parts. And dear tough hubby starts looking a little pinched face.
"Honey what should we teach her to say? Vagina? Hoo hoo? Cookie?" (I swear thats what a friend of mine calls hers..Im just going to leave that one alone.)
"Honey I dont want to talk about it"
"Although technically labia would be the part we're talking about..should we use labia?"
"Honey, enough, really, stop please!"

I couldnt help throwing the labia thing out there. Honestly Im not really comfortable using that myself but I knew it would throw him for a complete loop. But I found it interesting my own reactions to the words. I'm a woman after all-shouldn't I be more comfortable saying vagina over penis? I was rather surprised to find that I wasnt.

I wanted to raise my children feel to comfortable with their bodies. To be matter of fact about all body parts and try not to attach shame or embarassment to them. But now I find myself in somewhat of a quandry. They are both more than ok with all their parts. In fact they see no reason to ever have to cover them up. Since I have no plans on joining a nudist colony any time soon I need to figure out how to bring modesty into the picture. As yesterday so vividly pointed out. I looked into the backyard and saw sweet baby riding her tricycle.
"Sweetie you cant go outside in just your rain boots. Where did your clothes go?"

Discord in the marital bed

2007-02-16T22:48:00.000-08:00

We've all heard the old adage to never go to bed angry. Im not sure if there's more to it but thats all I remember. My husband and I have on several occasions went to bed angry. But things seem to work themselves out by morning. A foot touches and then is quickly moved away. Which is rather petty so the foot moves back seeking the other. And thus a connection is started..a working towards the goal of both bodies being completely touching by time they wake in the morning. A lot of things can happen, change, repair in that time that our bodies and conscience minds are resting. We might still be angry when we wake up but its been softened and diminished by our bodies own agenda. An agenda of wanting to return to the natural state of being as one again. Turning, scooting, snuggling until we find that restfull place where our 2 bodies find the most rest...in eachother.

Unless one of you snores. Then all bets are off. You can go to bed happy, peaceful, and loving and quickly become bitter, angry, and cranky because your sleep is being disturbed, again. And the object of my ill will has no clue. He just lays there snoring away..snoring me away.

I try to do the nudge thing with my elbow "please roll over" in the snoring sign language. Then there is the shoulder shake "you really need to stop snoring" and then the full body push with both hands "Its 3am and Ive had enough-change your position and quit snoring!" My husband usually responds with a sorry sorry, rolls over, and falls back completely asleep... snoring louder!

I now have 2 weapons in the fight against snoring. The new love of my life who always makes sure I have wonderful sleep-Ambien CR. If I take that and fall asleep first Im usually good to go for whole night of peaceful sleep. And if I do get woken up I probably wont remember it thanks to one of the drugs sideaffects-temporary amnesia. Its like a soap opera in a bottle.

The 2nd weapon isnt really a weapon..its more of a retreat. I just go sleep with one of the kids instead. ALthough they both are such restless sleepers Im not sure which is worse. Having a 2 year olds feet diggin into my side and then two seconds later resting across my forehead. And then she needs to lay on top me completely like Im a new memory foam mattress pad.

Sometimes the couch doesnt sound so bad but I know Id have to wrestle the dog for that territory and Im too tired to go into that battle armed properly. So back to the snorer again and our dance of pokes, rolls, jabs, and a snuggle once in awhile

I really am sick

2007-02-15T15:30:00.000-08:00

I have hypochondriac tendencies. Always have. My whole family does in fact. Although to be fair we dont invent illnesses..we just get creative when trying to self-diagnose. And when you've always been a sickie there's lots of material to work with.

Growing up my mom, sister, and I have always been rather lighthearted about sickness and death. I've had regular headaches since I was a teenager and we would always joke that it was my brain tumor acting up (my husband has an uncle who died from a brain tumor and he informs me that this is not something that I should joke about.) Im not a moron. I know cancer is bad. Horrible. Nasty. But if I joke about it enough maybe I wont get it.

We also know exactly how my mom wants to be buried (plain pine box please,) have divvied up all my moms earthly possesions, and managed to joke about the fact that my fathers ashes were stolen after he was cremated. At some point you either have to cry or laugh at the fact that your dearly departed dad was probably riding around the trunk of some thief's car for a couple of months until the coffee can was recovered (yes this is a true story.)

Back to being really sick. In an ironic twist of fate I actually have rather poor health. I am currently unable to yell at my baby that its not ok to run outside in nothing but her Easter shoes because of the laryngitis and bronchitis that I seemed to have picked up from No where! Now you'd think that since I tend to be a hypochondriac that I would run to the doctor at the first whiff of illness. Actually its quite the opposite. I have this running conversation in my head when I get sick. Am I really sick or am I being dramatic? I tend to try and believe that Im being dramatic so I usually put off going to the doctor..until my hubby kicks me in the butt to tell me that hacking up a lung is not pleasant to listen to and would I please get it taken care of.

So now Im once again on antibiotics that could choke an elephant (did I mention I also have pill taking issues?) At least I got the fun door prize of codeine cough syrup. Kids pop in a movie..mommy needs to take her medicine.

Cheater cheater pumpkin eater

2007-02-14T20:51:00.000-08:00

Ok this post has nothing what so ever to do with pumkins but being the mom of 2 small children I find myself rhyming things at the oddest moments. And I have decided to write whatever the heck pops into my mind so there it is.

But I am a cheater. I had 2 previous post on this blog and decided to erase them. One was boring and the other was...heck I dont know Im just glad to see it gone.

Speaking of cheating..is it bad to cheat when I play games with my 4 year old son so that I can win? Of course I would never get caught at it because I am after all trying to teach him about being a good sport win or lose. But I just need to win sometimes and Ill take it where I can get it-even if its against my unsuspecting preschooler.

Unless you know me well (or had the rare occurence to play something competitive with me) you would never know that Im super competitive. I do not and never have played organized sports...well there was a brief rugby stint in college but thats a story for another time. But give me Candyland, Pictionary, or some card game and watch out! I have this deeply buried need to win that somehow these innocuous games unleash-and its not a pretty sight. Which leads back to me cheating against a four year old. But hey, what he doesnt know cant hurt him..and sure does make the rest of my day. Its a cheap sad thrill but Im alright with it.